Ask The Expert – Page 7 – Empowering Your Mind

How long does it take to release outdated beliefs?

November 5, 2013 Linda-Ann Stewart

Question: How long does it take for the subconscious mind to release outdated beliefs?

Answer: I could be facetious and honest if I said “It takes as long as it takes.” But that wouldn’t be very helpful. Actually, there are a lot of factors that go into how long it takes. How badly do you want to make the change? Do you keep your mind focused on the change, knowing that it’s possible? Do you flood your mind with affirmations and statements of the change? Do you take actions that ground the change?

For example, if it would be for smoking, do you cut down, change the places you smoke, etc? For self-esteem, do you treat yourself well, do things that build your feelings of self-worth?

The subconscious will only release its old patterns when it realizes that you don’t need or want them anymore. Your conscious mind must convince your subconscious through the conscious mind’s focus and commitment. And the length of time it takes is in direct proportion to the amount of energy you use for the change. It could be overnight, or it could take years of small changes in that direction.

However, in general, any idea, thought, or belief that your conscious mind stays completely focused on for a month becomes a part of you by becoming part of your subconscious belief patterns.

Question: Can hypnosis help me believe that I will find my life partner?

September 28, 2013 Linda-Ann Stewart

Question: Can hypnosis help me believe that I will find my life partner, releasing the fear that it will never happen?

Answer: Hypnosis isn’t a magic wand, it works with the subconscious mind to help change attitudes, beliefs and both mental and physical habits quickly. Hypnosis can help to release fears, and help to believe in finding the perfect partner for you.

Settle on an affirmative statement about this, like “The person I’m looking for is looking for me, someone who harmonizes with me” and some of the characteristics you’re looking for. Write a statement that convinces you that it’s possible, then trust your subconscious to do its work.

As long as you doubt it, then your subconscious will be acting on your doubt.

Divide goal to smaller steps?

August 30, 2013 Linda-Ann Stewart

Question: Is it better to divide what we want to achieve (our goal) into small, easier to achieve steps in order to get faster results?

Answer: Many times it is easier to break up a goal into smaller steps, mainly so that your conscious mind can believe that they’re accessible. For instance, if you want more income, use a believable amount as your initial goal. That way you can feel successful as you accomplish it, and then set another goal of a little bit more. Or to release weight, set small increments of two, five, or ten pounds as your steps.

Sometimes, a person tries to break it up in such small steps that they’re micromanaging how it has to come about. In that case, it’s not a good idea for the smaller steps. For example, if some wanted a new apartment, they might state they wanted a certain amount of space (this is fine), for a certain amount of rent (this is fine, too), in a certain apartment building (not fine), on a certain floor (not fine).

Or someone might want a relationship. They could state the characteristics they wanted in their partner (this is good), how they would relate (good), and choose a certain person as their desired mate (not good).

In achieving a goal, your job is to decide what you want, break it into small steps that your conscious mind can believe and that your subconscious can accomplish without being overwhelmed. Then take any actions you know to take to bring it about. With you in motion, it’s up to your subconscious mind to find the way to manifest your goal.

What pronoun do you use with affirmations?

July 29, 2013 Linda-Ann Stewart

Question: Which is the best pronoun to use when saying an affirmation: I, you, or he/she?

Answer: You ask an excellent question. The answer, unfortunately, isn’t cut and dried. All three ways of phrasing affirmations have their uses. I most often use the first person (I), so that I identify with what I’m affirming. We tend to become what we identify with, and this is the way most affirmations are worded. This gives the subconscious guidance on what you want it to do.

However, when an affirmation is hard to accept, or our subconscious has some resistance to the affirmation, using a more objective pronoun is very helpful. Using “you” when stating the affirmation becomes a command to the subconscious. This pronoun is especially helpful when you want to directly order the subconscious on what to do. It forcefully breaks up any opposition to the affirmation. If you state and affirmation this way while looking at yourself in the mirror, it becomes very powerful.

When you’re too emotionally involved in the issue the affirmation is dealing with, the use of the third person pronoun “he/she/your name” is called for. Speaking of yourself in the third person helps when you need to deal with the issue a bit more objectively. It’s especially helpful when you need to improve your self-approval to accept the affirmation.

If you state an affirmation in each of these ways, you’ll notice a difference in the way you respond to it. Pick the way that seems to resonate with you the most at the time.

How do I balance tolerance with not accepting discourteous behavior?

July 3, 2013 Linda-Ann Stewart

Question: How do I balance my natural desire to help someone with my aversion to tolerating discourteous behavior from them?

Answer: I understand the conflict between wanting to help, and having that help rejected and stomped on. You can’t force someone to accept help. You can only offer it, and if it’s rejected, move on. There is no reason why you should put up with unacceptable behavior from other people.

That behavior shows their disrespect of you, others and themselves. We tend to train others how to treat us, so if you set boundaries and stick to them, people will learn what you’ll accept and what you won’t.

Sometimes the best way you can help others is not to help them, and to let them get bumped around. It’s really hard for those of us with natural inclinations to help, but that’s part of our lesson, too. To learn what kind of help others truly need.

Why do negative thoughts arise when using affirmations?

May 20, 2013 Linda-Ann Stewart

Question: How come when I use affirmations, negative thoughts take over my mind?

Answer: One reason the negative ideas may be surfacing is that your positive statements are flushing them out of their hidey-hole. As you put more positive in, the negative rises to the surface to be acknowledged before it can be released. But if they’re sticking around, something else is probably going on.

Sometimes the old, negative thought patterns resist our changing them, and the more we affirm positive, the more they clamor. Generally, it’s because they feel like they need to be there for to protect you. You accepted them at a time when they were necessary (or so you thought), but they aren’t helpful any more.

Sometimes, I’ll use an affirmation such as “I have outgrown old, outdated negative thought patterns that were implanted when I was much younger. My subconscious now recognizes that I no longer need or want them in that form, and releases them.”

Whatever you use, you need to understand that they’ll be there until you realize that they aren’t necessary any more. Sometimes it can feel safe to stay in the old (uncomfortable) rut, because its familiar. Or feelings of anger, hurt, fear or guilt can hang onto them.

In that case, you need to address those feelings. Just don’t resist the negative words, that gives them more power. Acknowledge that you recognize that they’ve been there, but you don’t need them any more. You might be surprised what surfaces when you do this.

What is a mantra, how do you use an affirmation?

April 17, 2013 Linda-Ann Stewart

Question: What is a mantra, how long is it used in meditation, and how many times do you say an affirmation?

Answer: A mantra is a word, phrase or sound that’s repeated during meditation to help a person focus their mind, and take their attention away from the outer world or their extraneous thoughts. How long you say it varies from spiritual system to system.

Some state you should say it for as long as you’re meditating, some state you repeat it until your mind is calm and serene, open to the Universe. If you’re using an affirmation as a mantra, I’d recommend that you repeat it to yourself until you feel it resonate with truth within you.

If you’re saying an affirmation out loud, it’s recommended that you repeat it for at least 15 minutes a day. But while doing so, concentrate on its meaning and on feeling its truth. The feeling connects it to the subconscious.

How do I use self-hypnosis to change a habit?

March 19, 2013 Linda-Ann Stewart

Question: How do I use self-hypnosis to change a habit?

Answer: Congratulations on wanting to change your life. Self-hypnosis can help you change a habit or quit something, but it takes dedication and commitment on your part.

For instance, I’ve had many smokers come to see me, saying “I really don’t want to quit. I want to want to quit.” In this case, they don’t have the commitment to stop smoking. They want a magic pill that will make it go away. Self-hypnosis makes the process of changing or quitting easier, it doesn’t make the choices for you.

Whatever it is that you want to change, you could decide what it is that you want instead of it. You could use an abstract, like greater self-respect or pride, or you could substitute something more concrete, like a carrot stick or green tea.

Once a day, in self-hypnosis, you imagine the desire for ‘whatever’ transferred to what you really want, and imagine yourself satisfied and delighted with the new substitute or abstract. Then, during your waking hours, whenever you think of the ‘whatever,’ you say to yourself, “No, I don’t do that anymore. Instead, I’m choosing ….”

The change won’t happen overnight, and you will have to dedicate yourself wholeheartedly to letting go of the habit or making the change, no matter what happens. And you may have to practice your self-hypnosis up to three times a day in the beginning.

How do I create a treasure map for a relationship?

February 20, 2013 Linda-Ann Stewart

Question: How would I go about creating a treasure map to attract a loving relationship with a mate?

Answer: I’d suggest you write down the attributes and characteristics you want, such as: honesty, integrity, treats me well, values me, respects me, a sense of humor that harmonizes with mine, etc. Think of the things you’ll want to do together, have similar interests, etc.

Then, when you have this list, start looking for pictures that evoke those feelings in you, that remind you of what you want, such as a couple strolling together, having dinner together, etc. Choose whether you want it on a posterboard, construction paper, or in a notebook. For love, it’s been suggested that you use a rosy-pink color for the background. Paste or tape the pictures on the paper or board. Scatter the words and phrases that you’ve listed around these pictures.

Somewhere prominently on the page, write an affirmation, such as: “Infinite Intelligence knows who the perfect partner for me is. I now attract the Divine Right partner into my life, someone who harmonizes with me.” You might include something about Divine Timing. Or write a statement that, to you, describes the manifestation. Look at your treasure map several times a day, and know that your creative mind is working on it. Don’t worry about ‘how’ it will happen, just follow any leads or opportunities.

For more information on making a treasure map, read Creating A Treasure Map To Achieve Your Desires.

Why have I been blocked from manifesting a change in my career?

January 16, 2013 Linda-Ann Stewart

Question: Why have I been blocked from manifesting a change in my career?

Answer: If you’re having trouble manifesting your chosen career, I’d suggest examining what your beliefs about it are. You may feel that it’s going to be difficult to make it, you could have a core belief that you have to struggle, or you may have had a life where you tried to please people and fear their envy if you’re successful. Begin by meditating on what you feel is blocking it. You can also affirm that “The truth of this situation is now revealed to me.”

In manifesting what you want, you need to let your subconscious mind know what you want, and trust that it will manifest it in due time. You can affirm that you may not know what to do next, but your subconscious mind knows and now brings to you whatever you need. Follow any leads, any ideas that might come to you. Realize that the result may not come directly from what actions you take, but the actions are creating a ripple effect, and the fulfillment may come from an unknown direction.

Empowering Your Mind

Mindset, Motivation and Empowerment

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