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Surmount the Law of Reverse Effect

Surmount the Law of Reverse Effect

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by Linda-Ann Stewart

Have you ever unsuccessfully tried to force your way through an obstacle? This generally just results in frustration and stress. Here’s a tip on how to overcome this tendency and maintain your peace of mind. Watch Surmount the Law of Reverse Effect.

Transcript:

Welcome to your monthly mindset tip. Have you ever found yourself trying to push through an obstacle, only for it to become more solid? I know I have. My mom used to say that, “Banging your head against a brick wall, will only get you a sore head.”

The Law of Reverse Effect, or Reversed Effort,  explains this tendency. The harder you try to force something, some action, some result, the more that energy is going to build to block you. That’s why it’s called the Law of Reverse Effect or Reversed Effort. Putting effort into a goal or activity is valuable, but when it’s not getting you anywhere, except a sore head, it’s time to try something else.

I’d like to share a tip on how to keep you from having a sore head.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

To surmount the Law of Reversed Effort, the first thing to do is to notice when you’re starting to feel pressure or frustration. Like you’re trying to force a particular result to happen.

When you recognize the stress building, find a way to shift your energy. Walk away from your efforts for a little while. Do something pleasant or enjoyable. I do this when I’m having trouble on a creative project, or even when my checkbook won’t balance. Give your subconscious mind some time and space to find a solution, a new insight or a new direction.

After you’ve restored your sense of balance, return to your endeavor and consider it from a fresh perspective. This will likely give you the breakthrough you need. And it will keep your composure, and head, intact. Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Read the accompanying article, Overcome the Law of Reversed Effort, Part 1.

Rewrite the Stories Holding You Back

Rewrite the Stories Holding You Back

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As children, we often believe false ideas about ourselves that adults told us. These ideas become beliefs, and we act on them as if they were true, even though they weren’t. You can begin to rewrite those old stories, using the simple exercise in this video. Watch Rewrite the Stories Holding You Back.

Transcript:

Thank you for joining me for mindset tips.

Did you know that, as children, we believe stories about ourselves, and then act on them as if they’re true? A budding artist gets told by a teacher that she has no talent, so she abandons her passion. An elementary school teacher can’t explain math, then blames her students for being dumb when they don’t understand. In the years following, the students under perform in that subject. A frustrated parent lashes out and tells a child that they’ll never amount to anything. And the child grows up to sabotage themselves just before they’re about to succeed.

All of these opinions are demonstrably false, but the children who received them accepted the ideas were true. Then those children grew up acting on the lies, and those falsehoods became self-fulfilling prophecies. Do you carry any such stories that you believed that then became true for you?

Judgements that you’ve accepted about yourself were programmed into you earlier in life. Just because you believe them doesn’t make them accurate. I’d like to share a short, mindset exercise to help you begin to erase those lies and rewrite your story about yourself.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

Here’s the exercise. Divide a piece of paper into two columns. In the first column, write down something you’ve been believing, some judgement, some idea from childhood that’s been holding you back. Something like, “I’m not good enough.”

Beside it, in the second column, write, “That’s a lie” or “That’s a falsehood” or any other phrase that denies its validity.

Below, in the first column again, write the opposite of that false belief, such as, “I am enough.” Include comments from friends, co-workers, or even superiors that support your new idea about yourself.

Include any objective measurement that confirms this new belief. Then, in the second column, write, “This is the truth,” or “This is the fact,” or anything else that confirms it for you.

It may take some time, but this exercise will help you deconstruct childhood programming, and recognize and accept what is true about you. Keep repeating the new idea to yourself. As you do, you’ll begin acting on your new belief, which will change the course of your life for the better.

Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Read the accompanying article, What Stories Are You Telling Yourself That Are Holding You Back?

Break the Habit of Complaining

Break the Habit of Complaining

Did you know that the average person, in general, complains 15-30 times, or about 8 minutes, a day? Unfortunately, it’s all too easy to fall into a habit of complaining without even realizing it. And it can be a difficult habit to break. Discover a mindfulness tip that can help you, and shift your mindset to be more positive. Watch Break the Habit of Complaining.

Transcript:

Welcome to mindset tips.

Did you know that the average person, in general, complains 15-30 times, or about 8 minutes, a day? From what I hear around me, I’d bet it’s a lot more than that. Unfortunately, it’s all too easy to fall into a habit of complaining without even realizing it. Have you ever noticed that? And it can be a difficult habit to break. I’d like to share a mindfulness tip that can help you break the habit, and shift your mindset to be more positive.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

This is a tip that has been used for decades, in one way or another, and it’s very simple. Mainly, it’s to make you aware of when you complain, which means you can then decide whether you want to continue or not. When a habit is brought out of the shadows and into the light, it can be changed. This empowers you and shifts your attention from being negative, to giving you the choice of being more positive.

The technique is to get a rubber band or bracelet and wear it every day. Any kind of bracelet, [Bands, elastic, sparkly, fabric, stones]…. Then, every time you complain, you switch the band or bracelet to the other wrist. No, you don’t snap it. … Just switch it from one wrist to the other. This allows you to turn the page….With practice, it can automatically create a mind shift to a more positive thought process.

You’re bringing the habit out of an unconscious behavior into being aware of it. You may discover that many of the things you grumble about are trivial, and you’re letting them pull you down. Some things may be out of your control, and complaining doesn’t help. Either way, the point is to notice when you’re complaining, and what about, and choose what to do from that point.

Since complaining compounds stress and stifles creativity, you may decide to simply refrain from contributing to the negativity. Shift your attention to what you can control and what you can do about the situation. This is more productive and will bring you greater rewards mentally, physically and in your personal and professional life.

If you’d like to break the habit, find a band or bracelet and start practicing.

Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Read the accompanying article,  Complaining Trains You to Be Negative, Part 2.

How to Undo a Complaining Mindset

How to Undo a Complaining Mindset

Did you know that complaining could train you to be more negative? Learn a simple technique that can restructure your brain so you’re more positive, which increases your well being and resilience. Watch How to Undo a Complaining Mindset.

Transcript:

Welcome. Thank you for joining me. Did you know that complaining could train you to be more negative? And that the more you complain, the more you find to complain about? Unfortunately, pessimism and complaining don’t lead to a healthy and happy life, right?  

What if you could learn a tip to turn that complaining tendency around so that you were more positive? Well, that tip is what I want to share with you today.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

The tip to help you undo your complaining mindset and train yourself to be more positive is probably one you’ve heard before. Gratitude. Just practicing gratitude for 8 weeks can actually rewire your brain to be more positive.

The practice is to write down 3 specific things you’re grateful for each evening for 2 months. Not general, … specific things. Instead of “I’m grateful I went for a hike,” be specific with, “I felt renewed and refreshed by being in nature, feeling the breeze, hearing the birds, and enjoying the trees, rocks and flowers.” This brings the pleasant memory into sharp focus for you to remember.  

As you practice gratitude, your brain changes its structure and the way you process experiences, and also improves your memory. You begin to notice more positive elements in your life. This increases your happiness, resilience and well being, and creates the tendency to be more positive. 

Can you commit to practicing gratitude for the next 8 weeks to improve your attitude and well being? If so, what are you grateful for today?

Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Read the accompanying article, Complaining Trains You to Be Negative, Part 1.

Getting in the Flow

Getting in the Flow

You have a powerful tool to create a better day for yourself. It will allow you to direct your energy towards your goals, and be able to enjoy better results. Learn about how this tip empowers you and builds confidence. Watch Getting in the Flow.

Transcript:

Welcome. I’d like to share a quick mindset tip for creating a better day for yourself. Wouldn’t that be great?

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

Here’s the tip. At the beginning of your day, focus on the best outcome you can imagine. Imagine it in detail, that everything goes your way. I know it sounds simple, right? But this tactic is very effective.

Imagining things going smoothly doesn’t mean you can’t create contingency plans. In Psycho-Cybernetics, Maxwell Maltz says to be aware of the possible problems so you can avoid them. He uses the example of a golfer. That golfer needs to know where the traps and obstacles are, but he doesn’t focus on them. His attention is on his ball and where he wants it to go.

Putting your energy towards bringing about the best outcome reduces your stress, and gives you more resources and creativity to handle any challenges. You act from a place of power and confidence, instead of fear. This means you have a much better chance of enjoying the results you want.

So focus, imagine and expect the best, and keep your eyes on the ball. 

Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

How to Develop the Flow State

How to Develop the Flow State

When you’re in the flow state, or “in the zone,” you’re more productive and creative. Learn how to cultivate that state naturally so your day flows more smoothly. Watch How to Develop the Flow State.

Transcript:

Welcome. Thank you for joining me. In this video, I’d like to give you a tip about how to enter the flow state when you want to work on a task or project.

You know what the flow state is, right? It’s an intensely focused state of mind, where all distractions fade away, and you’re totally involved in your activity. In sports, it’s called “being in the zone.” It’s a peaceful state that enhances productivity and creativity.

The idea I’ll share with you is one I use when starting to write an article, or in any interest I might find a bit challenging.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

My tip is, at the beginning of an endeavor that takes some effort, you may resist it, and try to distract yourself. This is natural. It’s rare to enter the flow state immediately, so you have to allow it to build. The state takes about 10-20 minutes to develop, if you keep at it.

So, work through the first few minutes of struggle. Don’t multitask or chase any squirrels, no matter how tempting. You could even tell yourself you’ll do something else after focusing on your task for 20 minutes. At the end of that time, you’ll probably find yourself engaged in your activity and want to continue.

Keep at it until you finish, find yourself at a stopping point, or your time is up. Stop when you still feel motivated, so it’s easier to pick it up later. In this way, you’ll train yourself to enter the flow state. This will allow you to get more done, more smoothly. In other words, it’ll flow. And wouldn’t that be nice?

Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Please read the accompanying article, Get Focused and into the State of Flow, Part 1.

Mindful Meditation to Ease the Season’s Stress (or any time of the year)

Mindful Meditation to Ease the Season’s Stress (or any time of the year)

There’s so much going on in this season that it’s easy to get overwhelmed. But stress doesn’t just happen during the holidays. It happens all during the year. When you practice this 3-step process, you’ll reduce your stress, which allows you to enjoy your life more. Watch Mindful Meditation to Ease the Season’s Stress (or any time of the year).

Transcript:

Welcome to my channel. I don’t know about you, but I tend to get overwhelmed during the holidays. There’s so much to do: find gifts, wrap them, mail some, decorate, write Christmas cards and on and on. All of this is in addition to my normal schedule stresses me out. Can you relate?

Stress like this doesn’t just happen during the holidays, right? Stress happens any time you have a change to your routine. That can be any time of the year.

In this video, I’d like to lead you though a short meditation to unwind. This allows you to be able to handle the adjustments and additions to your life beyond what you normally deal with.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

When you start to feel stressed, you aren’t as efficient or able to think as clearly. I start feeling like I’m bouncing off all four walls at the same time and trying to do everything at once. And that just wastes energy and creates more craziness, right?  

I’d like to lead you through this short meditation with a 3 step process to help calm you, bringing you back into the present, instead of trying to do weeks of activities in one day.

If you’d like, close your eyes.

First: Take three, mindful, deep breaths. 1: Inhale to the count of 4, exhale to the count of 8. 2: Inhale, exhale. 3: Inhale, exhale. This is a natural tranquilizer and will help you calm your nervous system down.

Second: Scan your body to determine if there’s anywhere you’re feeling tense. If there is, relax those muscles, You can scan from your head to your toes, or from your toes to your head. But anywhere you feel tense, relax that area.

This will also help to quiet your mind, and ground you in the now. You’ll be able to think more clearly and make better decisions.

Third: Use your imagination to imagine that all of your tasks are done easily and smoothly. Imagine that they’re all done in plenty of time to allow you to enjoy your celebrations with friends and loved ones.

Open your eyes.

Being calmer and more relaxed means you’ll be able to accomplish more. In addition, you’ll conserve your energy to get through the holidays with your sanity intact. And that will allow you to have more fun with your loved ones, won’t it? And you can use this guided meditation, these 3 steps, at any time of the year.

I hope you have a happy and harmonious holiday season! Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Read the accompanying article, Practice Mindful Self-Care During the Holidays.

Recognizing the Melancholy of Moving On

Recognizing the Melancholy of Moving On

After you’ve moved on from a situation, relationship or even change a mindset, have you ever felt melancholy or even a bit of emptiness? If so, you’re not alone. It’s a normal response, even when it’s a change you really wanted. Learn some of the reason’s why you feel sad, and how you can move through it. Watch Recognizing the Melancholy of Moving On.

Transcript:

Welcome. After you’ve moved on from a situation, relationship or even changed a mindset, have you ever felt a bit of melancholy or emptiness? If so, you’re not alone. It’s a normal response, even when it’s a change you really wanted. In this video, I’d like to share a way to look at that sadness that may help you through it.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

Whenever you let go of something, whether it’s something you want out of your life, or not, it’s natural to grieve its passing. This could be a relationship that has died, a goal that you’ve outgrown, or a mindset that no longer serves you. Even if the “thing” is something you are happy to have out of your life, it’s normal for there to be some sadness.

Some reasons for the sadness could be that:

  • You may have some wistfulness for the familiar.
  • You may miss the good times, or the benefits, you experienced.
  • You may be grieving that the promise, or the dream of the situation or relationship, is unfulfilled. 
  • You may regret the change you have to undergo as a result of moving on.

My mindset tip is, don’t try to deny or ignore the sadness. Let it flow through you, as long as it doesn’t overwhelm you. Resisting it will just make it last longer. By acknowledging the nostalgia, it will begin to ease and you can truly move on.

This closing of that door empowers you to open a new one. And you can use that energy to focus on your present and future, having faith that you’ll now create a more satisfying life. Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Please read the accompanying article, Is It Time to Move On?

Is It Time to Say “Next?”

Is It Time to Say “Next?”

Sometimes, nothing you do allows you to make progress. It seems like you’re beating your head against a brick wall. In this video, you’ll find a mindset shift, 4 tips of what to do when you’re feeling blocked, and a suggestion of what to do when nothing works. Please watch Is It Time to Say “Next?”

Transcript:

Welcome all. I don’t know about you, but there are times when I’m working on an article and it simply won’t come together. For you, the problem might be a sales prospect you can’t connect with, or you’re trying to lose weight, or you have a difficult relationship. The goal or situation just isn’t working for you, as it is. I’d like to share some tips on what to do when it seems you’re beating your head against a brick wall.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

The first thing to recognize is that you can’t be successful 100% of the time, whether in sales, habit change, relationships or goals. Hitting a baseball a third of the time is considered good for baseball players. Edison experimented with 100’s of materials for thefilament of the electric bulb before he found one that worked. He said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” Every person who has ever attempted anything has failed to begin with.

The reasons may be that you need more preparation or knowledge, it’s not the right person or place for you, you need a new approach or something else. Many times, it’s a numbers game, like with Edison’s filament.

My scientist father told me, “You only fail when quit trying.” Here are some tips for when you’re feeling blocked.

  1. Take a break. Let your subconscious mind mull over the problem.
  2. Take what you can learn from the issue, and try again.
  3. Come at the problem from a different direction.
  4. Dig for more information or learn more skills that might help you.

But there are going to be times when you reach a dead end and nothing works. At that point, it’s time to walk away and choose something else. That’s what I’ll do when I get nowhere with a subject I’m writing about. I let it go and pick another topic. The same can be true of any situation you encounter that’s not resolving.

Just because you abandon a circumstance that’s not working doesn’t mean you failed. It just means that you’ve learned what didn’t work, like Edison.  Maybe it’s time to seek a new path or opportunity. Don’t give up trying. Just change the conditions, change the situation. When all else fails, it may be time to simply say, “next,” and move on to something that does work. Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Please read the accompanying article, Is It Time to Move On?

Overcoming Resistance

Overcoming Resistance

When you want to work towards a goal, often you’ll have a resistance to getting started. But to be able to accomplish anything, you have to get past that resistance. Learn some of the reasons for  resistance, and how you can work your way through it. Watch Overcoming Resistance.

Transcript:

Welcome. Today, I’d like to talk a little bit about the resistance you might have with getting started on a goal, and how you can work through it.

Have you ever been sitting on the couch, watching TV, all comfy and cozy? You know you have to get up and do some chores, but you keep putting them off? You don’t want to leave your nice, warm nest. It’s hard to get moving and accomplish anything.

This is the problem when you have a goal, but aren’t taking action towards it. You may have have a resistance to change, want to avoid the effort involved in that change, or fear you’ll fail, or any number of other reasons. All of this factors into a resistance to getting started.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

Many of my hypnotherapy clients would resist changing their mental or physical habits. They dreaded the struggle, the commitment, the time it would take to create the change. This is natural.

I often experience resistance when I’m starting a project, writing, or even my hobby of weaving. I’m not sure all that it will entail, or what challenges lie ahead. Do you ever feel that way?

To overcome that resistance, what I do is take a step, just to pick at it, devoting a few minutes to whatever I want to work on. Sometimes, I have to pick at it, take a break, then come back to pick at it some more. Generally, after a few sessions of that, a few minutes leads to more time, and I’ll be on the way to getting it done.

When you’re experiencing resistance, first, acknowledge it. When you bring it into conscious awareness, resistance loses much of its energy. And sometimes, the reason you’re resisting becomes  apparent and you can set it aside.

Second, take some small action towards your goal. Fiddle with it, work around the edges, for a few minutes at a time. The point is just to get moving. This builds motivation.

Take a tiny step. Not only does this make you feel better, it makes it easier to chip away at it. Pretty soon, you’ll build up some momentum and get into the swing of what you need to be doing to accomplish your goal.

What small action can you take now that will cause you to chip away at your goal? Use that to build your motivation and momentum. Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Read the accompanying article, Moving from Motivation to Momentum.