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Break the Habit of Complaining

Break the Habit of Complaining

Did you know that the average person, in general, complains 15-30 times, or about 8 minutes, a day? Unfortunately, it’s all too easy to fall into a habit of complaining without even realizing it. And it can be a difficult habit to break. Discover a mindfulness tip that can help you, and shift your mindset to be more positive. Watch Break the Habit of Complaining.

Transcript:

Welcome to mindset tips.

Did you know that the average person, in general, complains 15-30 times, or about 8 minutes, a day? From what I hear around me, I’d bet it’s a lot more than that. Unfortunately, it’s all too easy to fall into a habit of complaining without even realizing it. Have you ever noticed that? And it can be a difficult habit to break. I’d like to share a mindfulness tip that can help you break the habit, and shift your mindset to be more positive.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

This is a tip that has been used for decades, in one way or another, and it’s very simple. Mainly, it’s to make you aware of when you complain, which means you can then decide whether you want to continue or not. When a habit is brought out of the shadows and into the light, it can be changed. This empowers you and shifts your attention from being negative, to giving you the choice of being more positive.

The technique is to get a rubber band or bracelet and wear it every day. Any kind of bracelet, [Bands, elastic, sparkly, fabric, stones]…. Then, every time you complain, you switch the band or bracelet to the other wrist. No, you don’t snap it. … Just switch it from one wrist to the other. This allows you to turn the page….With practice, it can automatically create a mind shift to a more positive thought process.

You’re bringing the habit out of an unconscious behavior into being aware of it. You may discover that many of the things you grumble about are trivial, and you’re letting them pull you down. Some things may be out of your control, and complaining doesn’t help. Either way, the point is to notice when you’re complaining, and what about, and choose what to do from that point.

Since complaining compounds stress and stifles creativity, you may decide to simply refrain from contributing to the negativity. Shift your attention to what you can control and what you can do about the situation. This is more productive and will bring you greater rewards mentally, physically and in your personal and professional life.

If you’d like to break the habit, find a band or bracelet and start practicing.

Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Read the accompanying article,  Complaining Trains You to Be Negative, Part 2.

Complaining Trains You to Be Negative, Part 2

Complaining Trains You to Be Negative, Part 2

by Linda-Ann Stewart

cup says 'choose happy'

In part 1, you learned that complaining harms your brain and body, but you can undo the damage. By taking control of your thoughts and refocusing, you can reprogram your subconscious to be more positive. You free up mental circuits to be more creative and seek solutions.

Reverse the Tendency to Complain

Within a few weeks of not complaining, you’ll notice a difference. You’ll have a more positive outlook, and have grown new neurons that support calm and peace of mind.  The Law of Attraction will respond by bringing you the dominant ideas you’re now focusing on.  

Here are some ways that will help you refrain from complaining and build a stronger, healthier, mindset.

  • As soon as there’s a problem, acknowledge it and how you feel about it. Then, deliberately choose to look for a solution. You may not find one immediately, but your subconscious doesn’t like to leave a question unanswered. It will continue to work on it until it finds an answer. 
  • If a solution doesn’t come quickly, move on to ask yourself, “What can I do to change my perspective on the situation?” It’s said that “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” Changing your viewpoint opens you up to ideas and opportunities that would have been invisible to you otherwise.
  • You could ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?” As an alternative, you could even ask your subconscious to find some good to come from the situation. Your subconscious is a problem solver, and will seek ways to make lemons into lemonade. Leave it up to the Universe to find the good. This has always been my favorite response for any difficult situation. It’s amazing how effective this tactic has been.

Being mindful takes more effort, but can reverse the tendency to complain and the damage it causes. You’ll build stronger mental connections to be positive, and this ultimately brings you a healthier, happier, more successful, life.

Affirmation:

Whenever I have a problem, I focus on finding a solution. The Universe inspires me with ideas of what I can do to resolve the situation. I keep my mind open to unexpected opportunities as I step back to be objective. I don’t know how, but the Universe finds a way for something good to come to me as a result of this situation.

Watch the accompanying video, Break the Habit of Complaining.

Read Complaining Trains You to Be Negative, Part 1.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity.To boost productivity and reduce overwhelm, register for her FREE guide, Design Your Best Day, at https://www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html

How to Undo a Complaining Mindset

How to Undo a Complaining Mindset

Did you know that complaining could train you to be more negative? Learn a simple technique that can restructure your brain so you’re more positive, which increases your well being and resilience. Watch How to Undo a Complaining Mindset.

Transcript:

Welcome. Thank you for joining me. Did you know that complaining could train you to be more negative? And that the more you complain, the more you find to complain about? Unfortunately, pessimism and complaining don’t lead to a healthy and happy life, right?  

What if you could learn a tip to turn that complaining tendency around so that you were more positive? Well, that tip is what I want to share with you today.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

The tip to help you undo your complaining mindset and train yourself to be more positive is probably one you’ve heard before. Gratitude. Just practicing gratitude for 8 weeks can actually rewire your brain to be more positive.

The practice is to write down 3 specific things you’re grateful for each evening for 2 months. Not general, … specific things. Instead of “I’m grateful I went for a hike,” be specific with, “I felt renewed and refreshed by being in nature, feeling the breeze, hearing the birds, and enjoying the trees, rocks and flowers.” This brings the pleasant memory into sharp focus for you to remember.  

As you practice gratitude, your brain changes its structure and the way you process experiences, and also improves your memory. You begin to notice more positive elements in your life. This increases your happiness, resilience and well being, and creates the tendency to be more positive. 

Can you commit to practicing gratitude for the next 8 weeks to improve your attitude and well being? If so, what are you grateful for today?

Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Read the accompanying article, Complaining Trains You to Be Negative, Part 1.

Complaining Trains You to Be Negative, Part 1

Complaining Trains You to Be Negative, Part 1

by Linda-Ann Stewart

cup says 'choose happy'

Venting about a problem is a normal human reaction. When something goes wrong, you acknowledge it, and express your dissatisfaction and frustration. After you grumble, you generally deal with it, look for a solution and move on.

The Problem with Complaining

But if you begin to dwell on the problem, you make the switch to a complaining mindset. Every time you gripe to someone about the situation, your mind is replaying it in your imagination. And your mind can’t tell the difference between your imagination and reality. To your mind and body, the problem is happening in real time all over again. The repetition affects you as much as the situation did originally.

Chronic complaining stresses and damages your physical and mental health. It affects your mood, encourages helplessness, impacts memory, reduces problem solving, weakens your immune system, raises your blood pressure, and much more. It also closes off your connection to the Universe. You wouldn’t think that complaining would cause so much harm. But it does.

Complaining Trains Your Brain

And complaining doesn’t just affect your physical health. In neuroscience, it’s said that, “Neurons that fire together, wire together.” Which means that the more you complain, the more neurons you’re creating to notice problems and feel helpless. You’re training your subconscious to be negative and look for fault everywhere.

And the more negative you are, the easier it is for you to be negative overall. Where your attention goes, energy flows. It’s a cycle that spirals downward. Complaining also directs the Law of Attraction to find more for you to complain about. Even being around other complainers can hurt you and lure you into modeling them.

But there is good news. You can use the same process to rewire your brain to be more positive.

Affirmation:

Complaining doesn’t help the situation, and only makes things worse. I now use my mind and attention in a more productive way. I protect my mental health by minimizing my time and shielding myself around negative people. The Universe guides and directs me to solutions, actions, or in any decisions I need to make. I shift my focus from what’s wrong to looking for what is going well.

Watch the accompanying video, How to Undo a Complaining Mindset.

In Part 2, you’ll learn some tips on how to stop complaining and reverse the damage that it causes. Read Part 2 of Complaining Trains You to Be Negative.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity.To boost productivity and reduce overwhelm, register for her FREE guide, Design Your Best Day, at https://www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html

Complaining: The Good, Bad, and the Ugly

Complaining: The Good, Bad, and the Ugly

by Linda-Ann Stewart

Thoughts

In January, Cookie was vacationing in Miami Beach. She sat on a bench while she waited for her daughter to complete a purchase. A couple of well-dressed elderly ladies with shopping bags sat beside her. They began complaining about the weather (which was lovely), the crowds (light), the prices (everything was on sale), and so forth. Cookie was put off by their negativity until they swiveled and flashed big smiles at her. She realized that they’d simply been playing a social game with each other to connect.

Complaining: The Good

Complaining has a long history and can have some benefits. For instance, taking a break at the water cooler and bemoaning the new regulations can be validating. It lets you know that everyone’s in the same boat and creates camaraderie. When Sally grumbles about how much work she has, it’s a way of getting attention. She does this to let people know that she’s overwhelmed or to get appreciation.

Or Jacquie grouses to her best friend about her husband’s untidy work bench, knowing that he won’t change it. But venting about it to someone she trusts saves conflict in her marriage. Jeff complained that the photographic printer paper he ordered was wrinkled. The vendor sent him a coupon that was worth more than the paper.

Social interaction, connection, acknowledgement, release, finding solutions are beneficial uses of complaining. They are time or situation limited and serve a purpose. Also, there’s a difference between complaining, identifying a problem and observation. Noticing that a light has burned out and asking it to be replaced isn’t a complaint. Or saying that it’s raining and you got wet walking in from your car is simply a statement of fact.

Complaining: The Bad

However, when complaining descends to a gripe-fest, then it can become counterproductive. Even a positive person can get sucked into one of these. For example, Josie attended a luncheon, and everyone started finding fault about something in their lives. It began innocently, with one grumbling about her mother-in-law, another about her own mother, and then it snowballed into a competition.

Each person tried to upstage the other in how bad things were in their lives. No one won and everyone felt dissatisfied with their lives when it was over. They didn’t want to repeat the experience so avoided the next lunch. This is when complaining starts becoming destructive. Most people are repelled by this kind of negativity. It feeds into a sense of helplessness and victimhood and serves no purpose.

It also triggers the stress response. The mind perceives the situation as a threat and signals the body to prepare for danger. The body then wastes energy braced for a problem that doesn’t exist. Not only is this unhealthy, but it shuts off the mind’s ability to find any solutions. Creativity, innovation and resourcefulness close down as the mind just tries to make sure the body survives.

Complaining: The Ugly

And then there’s Carrie, who’s a serial complainer. This is the most toxic kind of complaining. She calls a friend to whine about everything from the weather to how her mother told her to get a job. When she runs out of grievances, she starts over and goes through her litany four more times before she hangs up. She rejects any suggested solutions, and refuses to shift her attention to something else. Her friend feels like she’s been run over by a truck by the time the call ends. Carrie is firmly entrenched in her victimhood and doesn’t want to give it up.

Even if you aren’t a habitual complainer, like Carrie, you may gripe more than is best for you. When you focus on the problem, you won’t be able to access your ability to find a solution. All you’re doing is reinforcing the problem, and perpetuating it. Einstein said, “We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” You’ll have to shift your attention to be open to solutions before you’ll find them.

How to Change Your Attitude

Learn to identify what kind of complaining you’re indulging in, the good, bad or ugly. Become aware of what your purpose is for complaining. Do you want to connect with others, gain acknowledgement, find a solution, or something else? Is the result going to be empowering and constructive? If so, decide how you can best grumble and then move on.

However, if you just want to grouse because you’re dissatisfied with your life, it won’t bring you anything better. You’ll dig yourself a deeper hole and find more to carp about. In this case, it would be a better choice to refrain from complaining. Constructive complaining, or avoiding it completely, is more likely to get you what you want and offer more options to make positive changes in your life.

Affirmation:

Complaining focuses on the negative. When it can help remedy a situation, it can be constructive. I now become conscious of when I complain, and recognize my intention in doing so. When it isn’t constructive, I choose to let it go and focus on the positive. This is more empowering for me.  

Watch the accompanying video, Take a Break from Complaining.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity.To boost productivity and reduce overwhelm, register for her FREE guide, Design Your Best Day, at https://www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html

Get Focused and into the State of Flow, Part 2

Get Focused and into the State of Flow, Part 2

by Linda-Ann Stewart

In part 1, we examined what the state of flow is and how it’s beneficial to your life. The more often you enter the flow state, the more you train your brain to enter it at will. This means that you’ll be able to induce it when you need to work on a project, or complete a task. It also means that your days will have less stress, even if there are setbacks. The Universe has more access to guide and inspire you.

Here are 9 ways to build focus and train yourself to get into the state of flow:

  1. Crafting or hobbies. Knitting, jewelry making, woodworking, or any craft or hobby will allow you to slip into the state of flow.
  2. Meditation. This practice strengthens the ability to focus, and promotes a sense of calm.  
  3. Affirmations or self-talk. By giving yourself positive reinforcement, you’re able to reduce anxiety and promote motivation.
  4. Relaxation practice. When you relax your body, your mind lets go as well, which allows it to enter the state of flow.
  5. Visualization. Imagining each part of your day going smoothly gives your subconscious mind the direction to begin to work out solutions to problems ahead of time.
  6. Mindfulness. Objectively paying attention to your breathing, scanning your body, being aware of your thoughts and emotions, and not judging them, helps you to be in the moment.
  7. Music. Listening to music, without words, engages the part of your mind that opens to flow.
  8. Reading. Just 10 minutes of reading can lower your heart rate, stress and boost relaxation.
  9. Exercise. A work out, even just walking, releases brain chemicals that counter depression and boosts mood.

Focus, and the state of flow, changes the brain, creating new pathways that improve your attitude and resilience. The more at ease and peaceful you are, the easier it is for you to handle bumps in life. As you enjoy the state of flow more, your life can also flow more smoothly. You’ll be more in tune with Universal Good. Just as water flows around obstacles and rocks, so will you.

Affirmation:

I dedicate myself to practicing the state of flow. Each time I slip into the state of focused awareness, I’m training myself to repeat it whenever I want. When I experience this state more often, my life flows more smoothly. I have all that I need to successfully handle any situation or circumstance that arises. I am more easily guided and directed by Universal Mind.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity.To boost productivity and reduce overwhelm, register for her FREE guide, Design Your Best Day, at https://www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html

How to Develop the Flow State

How to Develop the Flow State

When you’re in the flow state, or “in the zone,” you’re more productive and creative. Learn how to cultivate that state naturally so your day flows more smoothly. Watch How to Develop the Flow State.

Transcript:

Welcome. Thank you for joining me. In this video, I’d like to give you a tip about how to enter the flow state when you want to work on a task or project.

You know what the flow state is, right? It’s an intensely focused state of mind, where all distractions fade away, and you’re totally involved in your activity. In sports, it’s called “being in the zone.” It’s a peaceful state that enhances productivity and creativity.

The idea I’ll share with you is one I use when starting to write an article, or in any interest I might find a bit challenging.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

My tip is, at the beginning of an endeavor that takes some effort, you may resist it, and try to distract yourself. This is natural. It’s rare to enter the flow state immediately, so you have to allow it to build. The state takes about 10-20 minutes to develop, if you keep at it.

So, work through the first few minutes of struggle. Don’t multitask or chase any squirrels, no matter how tempting. You could even tell yourself you’ll do something else after focusing on your task for 20 minutes. At the end of that time, you’ll probably find yourself engaged in your activity and want to continue.

Keep at it until you finish, find yourself at a stopping point, or your time is up. Stop when you still feel motivated, so it’s easier to pick it up later. In this way, you’ll train yourself to enter the flow state. This will allow you to get more done, more smoothly. In other words, it’ll flow. And wouldn’t that be nice?

Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Please read the accompanying article, Get Focused and into the State of Flow, Part 1.

Get Focused and into the State of Flow, Part 1

Get Focused and into the State of Flow, Part 1

by Linda-Ann Stewart

As a nature photographer, when I compose a photograph, I’m so focused that I’m immune to cold or heat. The same absorption is true when I’m weaving. When I enjoy these hobbies, my mind gets totally involved with them. Time ceases to have meaning and hours can fly by without my noticing. This is called the flow state or, in sports, the zone.

What Is the Flow State?

When the brain is in a flow state you’re intensely focused and only aware of the present moment and activity. It feels almost trance-like and is quite peaceful. In this state, you have a clearer channel to the Universe and are more open to Its good. This generally happens when you’re doing something where you feel interested, and engaged. It’s best if the activity isn’t so challenging that it frustrates or disheartens you.

Although, there have been times when I was struggling with a weaving issue (a pattern wasn’t working), I was still completely enthralled and time got away from me. After a few periods of immersing myself in the issue, I would solve the problem.

However, if the activity is too easy and you’re bored, then your mind starts wandering and you drop out of the flow. This is when you start impeding the stream of Universal good. If you’re working on anything that needs attention, you often start making mistakes and having difficulties. So getting in the state of flow is the sweet spot for a more peaceful and harmonious life.

Why the Flow State Is Beneficial

The benefit to being focused and in the flow is that your productivity, performance, creativity, self-esteem and well being increases, while your stress and anxiety decreases. It even improves your ability to think more positively and be happier. The more often you achieve this sense of focus and flow, the more you build inner resources to handle the challenges of life. These are advantages for work, recreation, and a better quality of life.

Unfortunately, our current habits of being distracted by multitasking, cell phone notifications, and scrolling through social media have undermined our ability to focus and to be in the state of flow. The good news is that you can develop the skill of focus and induce a state of flow that you can then use in all areas of your life.

In Part 2 next month, I’ll share some ways you can cultivate stronger focus and create a sense of flow that you can expand into other areas of your life.

Affirmation:

I’m choosing to be focused and present in my life. I narrow my attention to my current activity and set aside all distractions. This allows me to be calmer, more creative and more productive. As I enter the state of flow, I open a channel to Universal good, which streams through me, to me and into all areas of my life.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity.To boost productivity and reduce overwhelm, register for her FREE guide, Design Your Best Day, at https://www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html

Personal Development Tools for Success

Personal Development Tools for Success

Personal development is crucial for your success, as it enhances your self-confidence, motivation and performance. There are many different ways you can improve your personal growth. This video shares 5 tactics that can help you attract more opportunities for success. Watch Personal Development Tools for Success.

Transcript:

Welcome. Did you know that personal development was crucial for your success? Jim Rohn, entrepreneur, author and motivational speaker said, “Your level of success will seldom exceed your level of personal development, because success is something you attract by the person you become.” “… something you attract by the person you become.” That’s something to think about, isn’t it?

Personal development enhances self-confidence, motivation, and performance. This allows you to attract more success. In this video, I’d like to share some of the simple ways you can use to foster your personal growth.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

Now, there are many, many ways to improve your personal growth. The following five ways are the simplest I know, and you probably know of them, too. They’re ones that will give you the greatest traction.

  1. Affirmations or self-talk or auto-suggestion. These are all very similar. I have used and taught them all to clients. Each of these techniques are ways to program your subconscious mind with the beliefs and motivation that will further your success in life.
  2. Visualization. This is another way to program your subconscious mind with your goals and aspirations.
  3. Read self-improvement books and articles, and watch self-help videos. But don’t just passively consume them, apply what they teach to your life.
  4. Keep a journal. This could be by journaling, which is a stream of consciousness writing for insight and inspiration. Or you could keep a gratitude or acknowledgement journal that celebrates your progress and accomplishments.
  5. Practice kindness and compassion. Open the door for someone, smile at the grocery clerk. Simple acts of kindness improve brain health, brain function, mood and satisfaction.

These are just a few of the ways you can grow within. It’s not difficult to find ways to improve yourself, but it does take some effort to apply the techniques. Doing so consistently will raise your self-esteem and well being, and you’ll attract more people and opportunities for success.

Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Please read the accompanying article, Personal Growth Opens the Door to Success.

Overcome the Self-Talk Paradox

Overcome the Self-Talk Paradox

Many people have trouble using positive self-talk or affirmations, because they feel that they’re lying to themselves. They’re missing the point of what self-talk or affirmations seek to accomplish. This is the paradox concerning self-talk. When you state one idea that you immediately deny, you undermine your statement. By understanding the point of self-talk, and a tip to use it more effectively, you can overcome this contradiction, and be successful at transforming your life. Watch Overcome the Self-Talk Paradox.

Transcript:

Welcome. Some people have a problem with using self-talk, as they believe they’re lying to themselves. Do you know what I mean? For them to be able to accept their statement, they think they need to have already achieved the object, or the goal, of their statement. But they’re missing the point of what self-talk seeks to accomplish. This is a sort of imposter syndrome, and I’d like to share a reason causing it, and one way to handle the challenge.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus mentor, writer and hypnotherapist. These videos are dedicated to empower you to focus and align your heart with your vision so you can achieve your goals.

The purpose of self-talk is that it is directive. What that means is that it describes something you aspire to, that you want to be, have or achieve in your life. Self-talk gives your conscious, and subconscious mind, guidance as to what you are choosing for yourself. You haven’t gotten there yet, but this is something you are choosing.

If you’ve already accomplished the object of your statement, or your goal, then your self-talk is simply confirming what you presently have in your life, right? Because self-talk is aspirational, therefore you’re aspiring to something. Self-talk isn’t for something you’ve already achieved.

The way to handle the challenge of thinking that you’re lying to yourself, that reaction, is to realize it’s simply your subconscious mind bringing up old programming. Your subconscious is just trying to help you in an outdated way. Thank it for its concern, and then tell it you want it to support you in this new direction. Then repeat your self-talk declaration, with energy and determination. That will imprint your subconscious more powerfully with the transformation you want. With the direction you want to go.

Think about what that direction is, and create a self-talk statement that you can give to yourself consistently and persistently.

Thank you for watching. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you’d like to be notified when I release more videos on mindset, motivation and empowerment, please like my channel and click on the bell. As always, stay focused.

Please read the accompanying article, 4 Steps to Transforming Your Thoughts through Self-Talk.