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Overcome the Law of Reversed Effort, Part 1

Overcome the Law of Reversed Effort, Part 1

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by Linda-Ann Stewart

“The harder we try with the conscious will to do something, the less we shall succeed.” Aldous Huxley

“The harder we try with the conscious will to do something, the less we shall succeed.” Aldous Huxley

Have you ever tried to force yourself to go to sleep? What about willing yourself to relax or meditate? Usually, the harder you try to do any of these the opposite happened. The more tense or more awake you got. This is called “The Law of Reversed Effort,” popularized by Aldous Huxley, or “The Law of Reverse Effect,” first described by Emile Coue.  

Willpower Alone Can Sabotage You

Whenever you try to compel yourself to do some action, you create stress, tension and anxiety. Tension shuts down your creative flow, and the flow of the Universe. Stress sabotages your automatic mental and muscle memory, much like an athlete who thinks too hard about their next move. Stress blocks your progress.

Have you ever tried to change a habit with sheer willpower? It’s like trying to hold water in your fist. There’s no room for the water in your fist, and it slips away. Putting more energy into pressuring yourself to do something stirs up resistance to accomplishing it. And the more effort you put into trying to push through, the more resistance there is.

As a result, you start to think negatively, which just makes things worse, and more difficult. It doesn’t matter if it’s trying to balance your checkbook, complete a project, or change a habit. The more you try to force an outcome, the less success you’ll have.  

How to Make Progress

Instead, you have to lighten up. Open up and relax your fist, and use it as a cup to gather water. Take a step back, and let your subconscious work on a better way of achieving your next step. Often, when I’ve hit a snag with a creative venture, like writing or weaving, I take a break. When I come back to it, the answer is there or the activity flows more smoothly. For instance, to go to sleep you have to allow drowsiness to creep through you.

Other ways to make progress are to take small steps. This results in small successes, which triggers your reward center, and gains the attention of your subconscious mind. You could also focus more on your process, the steps you’re taking, rather than your ultimate goal or vision. This reduces some of the pressure, and is a valuable technique when you’re struggling to get something done.

Next month, you’ll learn about why the Law of Reverse Effect functions the way it does and one powerful way to overcome it.

Affirmation:

Instead of trying to force things to happen, I step back and allow them to take place. I now let go of all stress and tension. I open up to new ways and new ideas of doing things. By doing so, I allow the Universal flow of good to expand in my life. I’m guided by the Divine life within me to make the decisions and take the actions that benefit me the most.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity.To boost productivity and reduce overwhelm, register for her FREE guide, Design Your Best Day, at https://www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html

What False Ideas Do You Believe?”

What False Ideas Do You Believe?”

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by Linda-Ann Stewart

Thoughts

A client came to me with very low self-esteem. In our consultation, she stated that her parents had told her that she was “worthless,” she’d “never amount to anything,” and they “wished she’d never been born.” She wondered why she’d sabotaged her professional career, tried to avoid attention that could further her career, and had trouble with relationships. The trouble was that her subconscious had accepted her parents’ edicts as fact, and was following its programming.

No matter what she tried to accomplish, her subconscious was acting on false information about her as if it were true. It viewed everything about her through the incorrect lens of those ideas. If she began to succeed, it said, “No, you can’t. If you do, you’ll violate the beliefs of worthlessness that your parents taught you.”

When she tried to assert herself, her subconscious held her back with fear, because she’d disagree with what she’d been told about herself. She attracted friends and lovers who echoed her parents’ ideas, putting her down and belittling her. All of this was her subconscious mind manifesting her belief, or lack thereof, of her self-worth, and making sure that she stayed within the boundaries of its information.

Ideas Your Subconscious Mind Accepts

The subconscious mind will act on an inaccurate concept as if it were true. If you’ve accepted an idea that you can’t lose weight (stop smoking, make money, succeed, can’t paint or anything else), then your subconscious will make sure that the belief gets justified. These may be attitudes that were handed to you by parents, teachers, friends, family, or society and because of the emotional impact, you soaked them up like a sponge. From then on, the subconscious will view everything in your life through these attitudes and make sure that they’re confirmed. It’ll attract situations that will verify your beliefs.

Even if there’s an experience that could change your mind, because of the programming, your subconscious will only accept the information that would validate your preconceived notions. For example, Jo might receive a compliment from the boss on her work. But because she doesn’t believe she’s that capable, she’ll ignore it, telling herself that the boss just said that to make her feel good.

Your Beliefs Can Change

The good news is that these false concepts can be changed. It takes persistence and consistency, but by using affirmations or self-hypnosis, you can change the incorrect facts. The first step is to recognize what erroneous ideas you’re acting on in the present.  Where are they holding you back? Without identifying the problem, you can’t move to the solution.

Examine the thoughts that come into your mind when you’re about to succeed at whatever goal you have. If they’re negative thoughts about you or your goal, those are the incorrect assumptions you’ve been acting on. Then create a positive statement that counters the negative one. This is your affirmation that you use whenever you think of your goal. You can also use it in self-hypnosis when your subconscious is more receptive.

My client and I worked to improve her self-esteem, convincing her subconscious that her parents were incorrect in their assessment of her. They’d done the best they could with their background, but that they were wrong when they’d said those things to her. She began to do things that were more self-affirming, and soon had a promotion at work. It took some time, because the programming had been there a long while, but soon she attracted new friends who appreciated her. And as her opinion of herself improved, so did her entire life.

Affirmation:

Any thoughts that have restricted my good are false ideas that my subconscious has accepted. They are counter to what the Universe wants for me. I accepted those false concepts before I knew any better. My subconscious mind knows that I no longer need or want them. I release them and now create new ideas that are more in alignment with the good that the Universe holds for me.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity.To boost productivity and reduce overwhelm, register for her FREE guide, Design Your Best Day, at https://www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html

The Amazing Power of Your Imagination

The Amazing Power of Your Imagination

by Linda-Ann Stewart

Imagination

A few years ago, I was making breakfast with my then boyfriend, now husband. We were talking and, not paying attention, I reached into a 450 degree oven with my bare hand to pull out a cookie sheet. Not very smart. As soon as I put it down (no, I didn’t drop it), I ran cool water over my scorched fingers, then sat down to use the self-hypnotic pain management techniques that I know. I imagined the pain shrinking.

As the pain began to reduce, I had a spontaneous image that the heat from my fingers should drain into an ice cube. Although I thought it was an odd idea, I complied, because I recognized my subconscious mind was instructing me on how to perceive the pain. Within ten minutes, my fingers felt nearly normal. That’s the power of visualization.

The Power of the Subconscious Mind

The mind cannot tell the difference between reality and the imagination. If you get angry at someone on Monday, and tell a friend about it on Thursday, you’re going to feel all the sensations of being mad all over again. The subconscious doesn’t realize that what you’re relaying actually happened three days ago. It thinks it’s happening again, because it’s so real to you.

The same thing is true if you begin to imagine something wonderful happening to you, as long as you can believe it’s possible. I’ve helped people stop smoking, reduce weight, improve their self-esteem, increase their income, be more successful and make many other improvements through the use of their imagination.

By forming a clear mental image, you’re giving the subconscious a picture to create in your world. The subconscious is already forming your life from the images you’re holding in your mind. Think about it. Are you visualizing lack and limitation, or health, abundance and harmony? The clearer the picture you have, the more often you mentally rehearse it, the easier and faster it will manifest.

How to Use Visualization

Many people complain that they can’t visualize or use mental images, but everyone does in some way. Visualizing is rarely as clear as watching a movie screen. Imagine you’re in your living room and describe it to someone. That’s visualizing. Some people imagine textures, how they feel, or hear in their imaginations before they will hazily see images. You can strengthen all of your visualization senses with practice.

When you use your imagination to improve your life, make a clear mental statement of your desire, as if you already had it. Do you want more income, if so, how much? Make it an amount that you believe you can have. Visualize that amount flowing into your bank account every month. Are you wanting to reduce your weight? Imagine yourself turning away from sweets, eating less, and imagine your body feeling more slender. Pay attention to any spontaneous images you get from your subconscious concerning your desire. Many times your inner mind will give you feedback as to what will best prime it to create.

Every time you think of your issue, substitute your mental picture and state the affirmation you created at the beginning. Visualize it as you’re going to sleep at night. Act in ways consistent with your goal. Take some action, even if it’s just symbolic or a ceremony, to show your subconscious that you really want your desire. If you want more business, place an ad, give a talk, or make contacts to start the energy flowing.

Although my grabbing that cookie sheet should have blistered four of my fingers, it didn’t. I had only momentary discomfort a couple of times that day, and used the ice cube image each time. The next day, I had only light red mark on the most affected finger, and nothing visible on the other three. Use the amazing power of  your imagination to create the life you want.

Affirmation:

I form a clear, mental idea of what I want. The Universe has already approved of it for me, so it’s up to me to accept it. I believe that I deserve it. I can feel its reality, see its completion, and recognize how it affects other areas of my life. My subconscious mind knows how to create it, and I trust my subconscious mind to fulfill my visualization harmoniously. I accept my desire, or something better, into my life now.

Improve Your Life As You Sleep

Improve Your Life As You Sleep

by Linda-Ann Stewart

Many years ago, a hypnotherapist told me that she would make a hypnosis tape of her goals to listen to as she went to sleep. When she mentioned this, I remembered that, years before, I’d made myself an affirmation tape to listen to as I drifted off, and the ideas on that tape had made a significant difference in my life. On many occasions since then, I’ve had a tape playing as I go to sleep. As with the affirmations, the goals and concepts on my tape tend to become realities in my life.

Many times, a client would come to me and tell me that the only time that they can listen to the reinforcement tape of their session was as they’re going to sleep. I told them, “That’s fine. As a person goes to sleep, they’re going through the same level of awareness that we use in hypnosis.” I went on to explain that it generally takes longer than thirty minutes to get into the deep level of sleep, and even then the subconscious is still hearing and listening to what’s being said. Have you ever been deeply asleep, and had a strange sound bring you wide-awake? That’s the subconscious mind monitoring your environment and recognizing when there’s something unusual or dangerous, and waking you to deal with it.

Using Affirmations as You Drift Off

But a person doesn’t need an audiotape to utilize this excellent time. Just repeating an affirmation as you go to sleep is a great way to imprint new concepts, goals and ideas. Joseph Murphy, author of many books on the subconscious, suggested repeating the word “Wealth,” rather than “I am wealthy” to avoid any resistance from the subconscious. “I am wealthy” might bring up arguments that “No, I’m not,” “I don’t have a cent to my name,” etc. Simply saying “Wealth” brings up the images and feelings of being well taken care of, which is what impresses the subconscious.

Many people use the time before sleep to think of a problem they have, and then affirm, “I’ll have the answer to it in the morning.” There is now research to support that sleep can be a creative time. If a person believes that their subconscious will be working on a solution, then they will awaken with the answer. A study has found that the person who “Sleeps on it” will be twice as likely to awaken with insights and solutions than the person who stays awake to think and worry about the problem.

Program Your Goals as You Sleep

One of my colleagues calls the time before sleep “My time.” When he has a particular goal, he uses his imagination to make it real for him. He visualizes how it would feel to have accomplished it, and lets his subconscious figure out the way to make it happen. By doing this, he went from having barely enough to live on to owning a beautiful house, investments, and retiring at an early age.

Decide on one area of your life that you want to improve. Then find a short affirmation or word that embodies your desire. Use your imagination to visualize your goal as if it were already accomplished. To reduce weight, imagine yourself at your perfect weight, exercising and enjoying the activity, leaving food on your plate, feeling slim and energetic. To stop smoking, imagine yourself saying, “No thank you” to a cigarette, being free of urges, and being able to breathe better. For prosperity, imagine your bank account at a particular amount by a certain date. If you want more appreciation at work, imagine being congratulated on a job well done, being promoted, feeling satisfied.

When I wake up in the middle of the night, I usually repeat the phrase “I open my mind to receive more Good” as I drift back off to sleep. It’s short and simple enough that I don’t have to work to remember it. Drifting off to sleep is one of the best times to impress new information into the subconscious mind. If you consistently use this time to program your mind with what you want, you’ll find that your life improves drastically in a very short time.

Affirmation:

As I drift off to sleep, I program my mind with the goal that is most important to me. I open my mind to receive more of the Good that Life wants to give me. I know that my subconscious mind is very creative, and has all the knowledge and resources it needs to find the solution. I am guided in the direction I need to go to make real my desire. Everything I need for the accomplishment of my goal is provided. I trust my subconscious mind to figure out how to bring about my desire.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity.To boost productivity and reduce overwhelm, register for her FREE guide, Design Your Best Day, at Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html

Meditate Away Stress

Meditate Away Stress

by Linda-Ann Stewart

When people come into my office, I generally have to educate them about stress. They think that stress just arises from difficult relationships, the death of a loved one, or from the workplace. But stress can come from events such as Christmas, moving, a wedding or divorce, a vacation or even winning the lottery. The common denominator of what causes stress is a person having to adjust to something new.

Anytime you have something out of your normal routine, your mind has to make changes to accommodate the new circumstances. The subconscious mind doesn’t like change. It likes the status quo, so whenever anything throws it off its schedule, your subconscious complains.

The Results of Stress

Stress results in tension, anxiety, short temper, tiredness, memory loss, inability to sleep, worry, obsessing over non-essentials, and much more. When you’re stressed, you tend to believe the lie that you are separate from the Universe. Without relief, stress begets more stress, and escalates. If stress continues unabated, it will eventually erode the body’s organs, and create illness or disease.

The Benefits of Meditation

To combat stress and its consequences, meditate each day. This puts a break in the cycle of stress. Meditating and relaxing helps to calm the mind and body. Instead of always feeling on edge and in danger, meditation lets the mind know that all is well and you are safe. This allows the body and mind to recover and recharge. 

As a side benefit of meditation, you actually become more efficient, effective and creative. Your awareness of your intuition will be enhanced. Any kind of meditation will do, from concentrating on a mantra, to doing self-hypnosis. Select the one that you resonate with. You just need to take the time to center, getting back in touch with yourself and your Higher Self. By doing so, you’ll have more time and resources to deal with the events of your life.

Affirmation

I am now relaxed and calm in every situation and circumstance. I know the the Universe protects and guides me at all times. As I take the time to center in this knowledge each day, my life flows more smoothly. When a challenge arises in my life, I remember that the Universe has any answer that I need. I open my mind to listen for the solution.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity.To boost productivity and reduce overwhelm, register for her FREE guide, Design Your Best Day, at https://www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html You can contact her at LAS@Linda-AnnStewart.com or 928-600-0452.

Reprogram Your Negative Self-Chatter

Reprogram Your Negative Self-Chatter

by Linda-Ann Stewart

Thoughts in a head

Have you ever monitored what you say to yourself? Listened to the self-talk that chatters away without your being aware of it? Automatic phrases, such as “I can’t do this,” “I’m not worthy,” “I can’t handle this,” “I can’t afford it” and others. You may even find yourself saying them to the people in your life. These are beliefs that have been programmed into you, just like into a computer. Suppose the boss asks you to come into his office. Your first reaction may be “Uh, Oh. I’m in trouble,” even though he may want to praise you.

These ideas come from your past, but  they create a self-fulfilling feedback loop in your subconscious. Without your being aware of it, they provide background noise in your life. Is it any wonder that it’s hard to make any changes? They echo the words of parents, siblings, friends, teachers, anybody whose opinion you ever accepted, whether it was true or not. You were hypnotized into believing them, and you’ve stayed true to the conditioning.

How to Reprogram Negative Thoughts

An affirmation is a statement that confirms what you hold to be true, and though we generally use the term for positive declarations, these statements can be either positive or negative. When you tell yourself over and over that you’re not worthy , it convinces your subconscious that this is what you want, and your subconscious creates this reality.

The first step is to become aware of what you’re telling yourself. Write down these statements. Then formulate a sentence that counters what you’ve been believing all these years. Use it repetitively, because that’s how you were programmed in the first place. By hearing the same or similar things over and over.

Remain conscious of the background noise of your thoughts. And when the negative statement rises up, use your new phrase. Be patient. That original idea has been there a long time. It’ll take time, consistence, and persistence, but eventually you’ll change the thought to one that more truly reflects the Universe’s loving opinion of you.

Affirmation:

I monitor my self-talk and now become aware of what I’m telling myself. I realize that these negative ideas came from the past and have no relation to my present life. I recognize my own worth and the authority of my positive declarations. I am patient, consistent and persistent in reprogramming my mind, for I know that the changes are happening with every constructive affirmation that I state.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, freedom, wellbeing and prosperity. Register for her FREE Design Your Best Day guide and guided meditation video at www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html. You can contact her at LAS@Linda-AnnStewart.com or 928-600-0452.

Podcast Interview – Hypnotizing Your Mindset to Achieve Your Goals

Podcast Interview – Hypnotizing Your Mindset to Achieve Your Goals

Lois Sonstegard, Ph.D., ACC and I were introduced through a mutual acquaitance, and Lois invited me to be interviewed on her podcast, Building My Legacy. The podcast encourages, stimulates, challenges and motivates you as a leader to answer , “What’s next in my life?” She thought I had a unique perspective that her listeners would appreciate.

Because of my background as a hypnotherapist, we started out talking a bit about hypnosis.  As most people are, Lois was curious about the process. She was slightly surprised to hear that hypnosis is simply an intensely focused state of attention. We discussed how my hypnotherapy practice and what I learned from it has inspired my work as a coach for women small business owners.

We talked about our how, because we live in such a technologically driven world, and it’s easy to get distracted. Distraction from what’s important will undermine you personally and professionally.  Being distracted causes stress, and prevents you from thinking clearly or creatively. When you’re stressed, you react to the immediate problem without thinking the issues through. During our exchange, I described a simple technique you can use to calm your mind down and think more clearly.

Unfortunately, distraction can become a habit. The more you get distracted, the more you train yourself to be distracted. The good news is that if you can train yourself to be distracted, you can train yourself to be focused. I explained the process I use with my clients, to help them gain clarity, get focused and stay on course. Most people know what they don’t want, but have a hard time figuring out what they do want. At Lois’ request, I shared a technique I teach my clients to gain clarity. 

We had a delightful conversation. I love offering tips and explanations that empower people to have more satisfying and fulfilled lives. For more of Lois’ podcasts on becoming a better leader in your personal and professional life, listen to Building My Legacy on Spreaker or any of the major podcast channels.

Listen to Hypnotizing Your Mindset to Achieve Your Goals.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Podcast Interview – Thrive Through Greater Self-Worth

Podcast Interview – Thrive Through Greater Self-Worth

Emmalou Penrod M.A., of Healing Your Families, and I were introduced by a mutual acquaintance. In our initial conversation, we realized we had something in common. We both had been trained to use hypnosis to improve people’s lives! She’s a retired schoolteacher, and now coaches families to have more peaceful homes. She’s a parenting and family strengthening expert, and brings her knowledge of counseling to help heal families.

As we talked, we had such a connection that she invited me to be interviewed on her podcast at WinWinWomen.tv. Although family issues aren’t my professional area of expertise, one topic that affects everyone is self-worth. My specialties as a hypnotherapist were stress management, success programming and self-esteem/self-worth issues. Since Emmalou and I agreed that having better self-worth made better parents, we decided that would be a great topic to cover.

In the interview, we began by talking about how I became a focus coach for women small business owners. I explained that women tend to be scattered because of all their responsibilities. It’s difficult for them to focus for any length of time on any one thing. But focus is necessary to accomplish anything.

Then Emmalou asked about the opposite of focus, “What do you think of multitasking?”

“Multitasking” is a myth,” I answered, and explained why. She said she’d heard it described as “a lie,” which is also true. Multitasking keeps your brain fractured between all the different tasks. It breaks your train of thought, so you can’t build up momentum on any project or task.

This led into discussing the difference between self-esteem and self-worth. Self-esteem can be impacted by outside variables and self-worth is more internal and fundamental. And both are impacted by having a strong inner critic. Emmalou liked my perspective on the inner critic not being a bad guy, but fulfilling a role that a person has outgrown.

Emmalou asked how a person could improve their self-worth. I answered that being kinder to oneself and being mindful helped to support and build self-worth. At the end of the conversation, I shared three simple steps on how to be kinder to yourself.

Because of Emmalou’s background, expertise and knowledge, I loved talking with her about this subject. I could have gone on for hours, but we had to fit into the podcast’s time frame. But I have articles on this topic here and on my website to help you reclaim your worth. And Emmalou has articles on her blog to help you become a better person, and thus, a better parent.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Special or Safe Place Imagery

Special or Safe Place Imagery

Sparks of Insight

Question: Does the “special, safe or happy place” in self-hypnosis or guided imagery have to be from a childhood place?

Answer: The peaceful, special, safe or happy place doesn’t have to be from childhood. When I’m leading a client into it, I tell them to imagine a vacation spot or someplace completely imaginary, where no one can bother them and they feel completely safe. It could be on a cloud, above the cares of the world, or on a deserted beach.

Only a few people have had a hard time with that, and usually it’s because they can’t remember ever feeling safe. In that case, I recommend that they think of a time when they felt a little safe, maybe with a trusted friend. I then tell them to continue practicing with it, because each time they’ll get a little closer to the feeling of safety.

Not only is a feeling of safety important for stress reduction, but also for any improvements in your life. If you don’t feel safe, the subconscious won’t to create anything new. It will still be in “survival mode” and consider that any change is threatening to your current tenuous sense of security.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Will hypnosis be dangerous if I misuse it?

Will hypnosis be dangerous if I misuse it?

Question about affirmations

Question: Will hypnosis be dangerous if I misuse it?

Answer: I get this question a lot. It’s based on a misunderstanding and misconception about hypnosis. If misused, anything in life is dangerous. Electricity powers our computers, lights, appliances, but if you put your finger in the electric socket, you run the danger of being killed.

In the case of hypnosis, it’s a normal state of mind that you’re in and out of everyday. Whenever you focus on anything, you’re in a state of hypnosis. The only way to misuse hypnosis is to give yourself negative suggestions that would decrease the quality of your life. But you do that whenever you make any kind of negative statement about yourself, put yourself down or say “I can’t.”

~ Linda-Ann Stewart