Are Your Excuses Really Lies That Sabotage Your Life?
An excuse can be worse than a lie, because you use it to hide your motives from yourself. Most people know when they’re lying to themselves, by a sense of discomfort, even if they dismiss it. But an excuse can seem reasonable, even rational, so it’s more insidious. Learn a way you can determine if your excuse is a lie you’re trying to pass off as plausible.
5 Proven Ways to Set Goals and Achieve Them
Goal setting is important because you’re either working your plan or letting someone else impose their plan on you. When you set a goal, you’re taking charge of the direction of your life rather than letting the wind send you wherever it blows. Studies show that those who set goals are happier and more successful. This article also includes a goal setting worksheet.
How to Say No When You Feel You Can Only Say Yes
Some people are people pleasers and have a hard time saying “No,” even when it costs them. Meeting others expectations is more important than meeting their own. This can lead to stress, overwhelm and a feeling you’re not living to your potential. But when you start saying “No” to what others want from you, you start making your life and goals important. Here are 7 tips to help you start saying “No” so you can be more successful.
Did you know that, according to a survey, about 80% of small businesses don’t keep track of their business goals or vision? They jump into action, without knowing where their direction. And that takes them nowhere. Before you have a plan, there are two other areas to address. In this video, not only do you discover what they are, you’ll learn about a complimentary teleseminar that will take you further.
The complimentary teleseminar, “Stop Spinning Your Wheels: Essential Secrets to Supercharge Your Business,” will be Thursday, May 10th at 6:30pm Arizona (6:30pm PDT, 7:30pm MDT, 8:30pm CDT, 9:30pm EDT). I invite you to visit Stop Spinning Your Wheels to learn more and to register. If you register, but cannot attend live, there will be a replay available for a few days.
How to Stop Procrastinating
Procrastination is something up to 95% of us do at some time or other. In this article and video, explore why it happens and strategies for managing and prioritizing your workload more effectively. Learn 4 tips on how to overcome the habit of delaying important tasks.
5 Toxic Personalities Successful People Avoid
Some people are dream killers or stop us from taking a risk, and we don’t always realize what they’re doing. It’s important to be aware of who we’re spending time with. We need to distinguish between those who support us. and those who don’t. Learn the five types of people to avoid when chasing goals.
The Extraordinary Power of Visualizing Success
When you think of obstacles, you allow them to stop you from achieving your goals. Top performers, in sports and business, know the importance of picturing themselves succeeding in their minds before they actually do in reality. Learn some tips on how to use visualization to accomplish your dreams.
~ Linda-Ann Stewart
Caroline was a massage therapist who worked in a spa. The spa did all the marketing and scheduled her clients for her, and paid her per client. But Caroline thought she could have more freedom and get more clients on her own. She left the spa, and opened her own office.
But she discovered that she hated the administrative chores the spa had done for her, such as scheduling, paying utilities, and marketing. This caused her to be chronically forgetful. She’d forget to take business cards when networking, pay her bills, or write down appointments, which caused her to miss them. Although her clients knew and liked her, they learned not to trust her and they went elsewhere. Because of her refusal to work on the details of her business, she made less than she had at the spa.
Finally, one of her friends confronted her and said that Caroline’s excuses were clues she was leaving herself. Caroline realized that she really just wanted to give massages. She gave up her business and returned to the spa, where she could let others handle the tasks she despised. She needed the structure the spa gave her. Even though she was giving up control, she was gaining the freedom she’d craved.
Do you chronically defend yourself, to yourself or others about why you didn’t do what you had agreed to do? At your core, you just didn’t want to do whatever it was. Something within you was preventing it. You’re giving yourself a message that you haven’t listened to yet.
When you use excuses, you’re giving the Law of Attraction conflicting information. On one side, you’ve agreed to something, and on the other, you are reluctant to follow through. By not being clear, the Law of Attraction won’t know what you really want. You’ll just idle in neutral until you decide which way you really want to go.
There are times when excuses are valid. For example, if you had a flat tire on the way to work. Or an important phone call delayed your leaving for an appointment. Events that are unexpected and unavoidable are legitimate reasons why you weren’t able to fulfill a promise. But the question to ask yourself is, are your explanations reasonable or are they just trying to get you out of trouble?
The stories you tell yourself are hints as to how motivated you are to achieve your goals, dreams and vision. They may be telling you how you feel about your commitment or your direction. Here are some of the possible messages your excuses are communicating:
Fear. You’re afraid of the next step or where it may take you. Or you’re not confident that you know how to accomplish your task, goal or agreement. Ask yourself, “What’s the worst that could happen?” Generally, when you bring the fear into your awareness, you realize it has little validity. Ask yourself, “What do I need to do to gain that confidence?” It could be something as simple as learning a new skill.
Not the right goal/dream/vision. You could be going in the wrong direction. Or your task, vision or your motivation to achieve it isn’t strong enough. When you find yourself not taking the actions you need to, ask yourself if you’re ambivalent over your goal. If there’s a part of you holding back, you need to address its concerns. Are you really committed to your dream or vision? If not, choose another one or scale back on your current one.
It’s a “should.” You think you “should” want a particular goal. Others have told you that it’s the right one for you. But it doesn’t really resonate with you, or you felt pressured into doing it. This one is especially true when you’ve agreed to do something you really didn’t want to do, such as participate in a charity event. Is it really your priority, or someone else’s? To simplify your life, decline someone else’s objective for you and focus on what you really want
These are just a few of the excuses we make. The only way you’re going to fulfill your goals is if you transcend your excuses. Listen to the message they’re telling you. When you hear it, and change your responses, you’ll be happier and on track to your dream.
Affirmation:
I now become aware of the excuses I make. I realize that they’re giving me powerful messages about what’s holding me back. Since the Universe only wants the best for me, it must be my beliefs and attitudes that are sabotaging me. By understanding the messages I’m giving myself, I’m able to change my beliefs and thus change my responses to support my dreams.
6 Exercises for Positive Emotions: Start Your Upward Spiral Today
Over the past few years, many researchers have found new and scientifically proven ways to increase positive emotions and well-being. The techniques described in this article have all been shown to boost positive emotions. They take some commitment, but they’re well worth the effort. Choose one, practice, and enjoy the changes.
7 Myths About Meditation Preventing You From Grasping The Amazing Benefits of Mindfulness
Meditation is becoming commonplace. But there are lots of misconceptions about it. People think mistake the goals and how to practice it. Meditation improves your concentration, self-awareness, and productivity, and your ability to show up in the world.When you’re able to better connect with yourself, you improve your relationship to yourself and others.
How to Make the Best Decision When You Have Too Many Options
Research has shown that when people are faced with too many choices, it can produce anxiety that actually makes us less likely to choose. As a result, we’re less likely to succeed. A study has the best strategy to use confronted with a large number of choices. When you’re having trouble choosing from too many options, use this technique to reduce your stress.
~ Linda-Ann Stewart
Answer: Most of us do have some unconscious resistance to moving forward in some area of our lives. The challenge is to figure out what it is that’s holding us back. Who are you trying to please? What would change if you did move forward, and what would leave your life? What would you eliminate from your life with the change? They may be things that consciously you want to let go of, but they’re holding on for some purpose.
Consider what those reasons might be, even if they don’t make sense. Many times, once we discover what’s been hanging us up, it doesn’t make much sense to us in the present. Remember that the reason was created a long time ago.
4 Proven Ways to Bounce Back From Failure
Setbacks are normal, and are actually teaching moments. The only time you fail is when you quit trying. That said, it can be difficult to get back into the swing when you feel you swung and missed. Part of the ability to do it more easily has to do with learned behavior, and part has to do with personality. The tips in this article can help you recover, learn from the experience and try again.
Are You a Goal-Getter?
When you set a goal, you may be uncertain about your chances of success in achieving it. But you think there’s at least a good possibility for it to happen. Wouldn’t you like to increase your odds of success? This article shares 7 steps to achieving the goals you want to accomplish.
How to Program Your Mind to Kick the Bad Habit
We all have bad habits of one kind or another. Sometimes, we excuse ourselves when we try to overcome them and don’t succeed. They’re just so much a part of us and it’s hard to change them. They exist because at some time in the past they helped us. But that time is past and if you want to eliminate them, use the 3 steps in this article.
Most people have misconceptions about what hypnosis is and isn’t. What they don’t realize is that they’re using this process in their lives every day, for their benefit or detriment. This is a brief explanation of hypnosis, by a hypnotherapist of 30 years. Join me to learn what it is, how you’ve been using it, and how you can use it to now benefit yourself.
Transcript:
I’m Linda-Ann Stewart. Ok, so I’ve been a hypnotherapist for almost 30 years. But most people have all sorts of misconceptions about hypnosis. They think that someone takes control of their mind and makes them do things they don’t want to do. Not. They don’t realize that it’s a normal, natural process that they access several times every day. And they walk around in a trance that’s impacting their ability to either achieve or sabotage their goals and their vision.
So today, I’d like to give you a very brief explanation of the natural process of hypnosis. I hope that you’ll walk away understanding how you hypnotize yourself every day. And how you can use this natural ability to benefit yourself.
I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a vision strategist. Like I said, I’ve been a hypnotherapist for almost 30 years. Clients came to see me to create change in their lives. Over time, I discovered that they had to also have a vision of where they wanted to end up with that change to be truly successful. Now, as a vision strategist, I help women entrepreneurs get a clear vision, get focused on its strategies and get back in control so they’re able to accelerate to the next level of their business.
When people hear that I’m a hypnotherapist, they have various reactions to it, based on their beliefs about hypnosis. Swinging watch. “Look into my eyes, and sleep.” It’s not true. And I can’t tell you how many clients have asked me, “Am I going to walk out of here barking like a dog?” My reply, “Not unless you want to.”
Not their fault. Their beliefs are based on what they’ve seen on TV and in movies. They don’t believe that an ordinary man can really “leap tall buildings in a single bound,” but they believe how writers sensationalize hypnosis because there are already so many misconceptions about it.
What TV and movies depict isn’t hypnosis, it’s Hollywood.
Did you realize you’re in a mild state of self-hypnosis several times every day? When you’re daydreaming, watching a movie, get so involved with a project that the distractions of the world go away, you’re in a light state of self-hypnosis. You’re driving down the road, daydreaming, and miss your turn. Have you ever done that? Should ask, “How many times a day.” We all do. Light state of self-hypnosis.
You walk around in a trance much of the time, not fully aware of what you’re saying (“Hi, how are you”), thinking (“I’m never going to get it all done”), doing (eat that donut without being aware of it, and wonder where the powdered sugar on your fingers came from).
That trance is self-hypnosis, and you’re hypnotizing yourself every day. It isn’t magic, a strange, mystical or other state of mind. Nor is it the “deep sleep” that people normally associate with hypnosis. It’s a natural state that most people drift into and out of many times during the day. Hypnosis is when the rational, analytical part of your mind isn’t as present. Hypnosis is simply a more focused state.
The American Society of Clinical Hypnosis defines hypnosis as a state of inner absorption, concentration and focused attention.
Secret – hypnosis also occurs whenever you’re upset, stressed or worried. Just for a moment, think about what you think about when you’re upset or stressed. Those thoughts become auto-suggestions. Scary, huh?
What most people don’t realize is that the things you say to yourself over and over that you’re only half aware of, are actually being said when you’re in a light state of hypnosis. Things like, “I know this won’t work,” “I don’t have enough time,” or “It can’t fail.” Do any of these sound familiar?
You then act on them as if they were true, whether they were or not. How that works is, suppose you’re afraid that your phone call to a potential customer won’t be welcomed. If you call at all, you’ll be nervous, not make a good impression, and end the call quickly. Your belief would have become a self-fulfilling prophecy. All from what you were telling yourself. Has that ever happened to you?
Remember, hypnosis is just focusing the attention. So it all depends on the direction and the beliefs that you’re focusing your attention on. And your attention determines your actions. “Energy flows where attention goes.” Heard of that before? Not airy-fairy. Psych truth.
It’s like driving a car. You’re aware of the traffic, the landscape, your dashboard. But the majority of your attention is on the direction you want to go to your destination. If you’re driving, and you stare off to the side, what’s your automatic response?…. To drift in the direction of you’re looking, isn’t it? The same principle applies to your daily life. Your attention drive your actions. So keep your vision directed towards where you want to be headed and not rear view mirror.
So how can you use this natural process for yourself – other than just focusing on your direction? When you have a goal or a vision, become aware of what you’re telling yourself about it. They’re auto-suggestions. Do you doubt you can make it? Are you afraid of any step along the process? If so, these are the hidden hypnotic suggestions you’ve been giving yourself. Break your trance. Change them with auto-suggestions. You can do this. Even if you don’t believe it right away, repeating new ideas with consistency and persistence will start changing the old ones. The old beliefs were simply ideas that you accepted some time in the past.
When you change your beliefs, your emotions and responses change. You’ve already been using the process of hypnosis every day, by what you’ve been focusing on. I hope you start using the natural process of hypnosis to create what it is that you want.
If you want tips to you increase your productivity and accelerate your success, download my free guide Take Control of Your Day. It will also give you information on a process I used with my clients that helped them achieve their goals and vision.
Thank you for watching. I hope you’ve learned how to use this process for your benefit and use it to improve your life.
What would you be doing if success were inevitable? How would you be leading your life? What would change? Consider what thoughts you’d be thinking, actions you’d be taking, and ways you’d be acting if your dreams were assured. I don’t mean that you should go out and buy a Mercedes if your current income is at the Honda Civic level, but how would you feel about your car? Before there can be a significant improvement in your life, you have to act and think the part first.
3 Reflective Ways to Refocus Your Thinking for Success
We tend to think that what we see in our world is reality. But we’re seeing it “through a glass, darkly.” Our thoughts and beliefs filter reality, and it’s corrupted data. To be more successful, we need to question our thoughts and not believe everything we think. Here are 3 ways to start doing just that.
Just looking at your smartphone makes you less intelligent, study finds
It has long been believed that smartphones are actually making us dumber; but now there is evidence for it. Researchers have found that having them in our field of vision makes us less able to remember information. This was true even when the phones were switched off. However, the further away the phone was, as in another room, the better cognition was. If you value your intellect, this article will make you think twice about being dependent on your smart phone.
Impostor’s Syndrome and the Afflictions of the Accomplished
Debilitating self-doubt affects the successful and struggling alike. Success and achievement is no guarantee that people will feel confident and and fulfilled. It seems that there are three key afflictions hold people back from experiencing deeper fulfillment. Here are some remedies for the fear of being “found out.”
Are Your Excuses Really Lies That Sabotage Your Life?
