Optimists learn to be positive, and it’s a skill you can develop. The benefits of positive thinking make it well worth the effort. Here are a couple of tips of how to assess what kinds of thoughts to let into your mind.
Copyright 2012 Linda Ann Stewart
All Rights Reserved
by Linda-Ann Stewart
My friend Lily read lots of self-help books, listened to motivational CD’s and went to personal development workshops and then complained that her life didn’t improve. When I asked her if she’d practiced any of the exercises in the books or CD’s or workshops. “No,” she said. “That’s too much trouble.”
To change, you need to participate and use the tools you’ve found. It’s easy to fall back into old habits. They’re familiar and comfortable, but they won’t provide you with a new direction. They won’t improve your life. There’s an old saying, “If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.”
Negative thinking is simply a habit. People aren’t born to be pessimists, they learn to be that way. It can be changed with time, attention, and energy. One of the complaints of negative people is that it takes effort to be positive. It always takes work to change a habit, no matter what that habit might be.
Are you going to continue to float along with your old ways of thinking and doing things? If so, your life isn’t going to improve much. What are you willing to do to make it different? Think of one thing that you could start doing, and then commit to practice it every day. It could be meditating, self-hypnosis, being mindful, an affirmation, journaling or one of any number of other techniques and exercises that you’ve found over the years.
By choosing to make one small, consistent difference in the course of your life, you’ll begin to break up the inertia that’s gripped you. Each day that you follow through with your choice will take you in a new direction. You have the power to change your life. You just need to work it.
Affirmation
I have the ability to change my life. All the power of the Universe is available to me to create new ways of thinking and new beliefs. I now decide to use the tools that I’ve been given to create new habits that are more beneficial for me. My life will only improve if I choose to change it. I take charge of my life and commit myself to my well being.
Copyright 2012 Linda Ann Stewart
All Rights Reserved
by Linda-Ann Stewart
At a meeting, I was talking with a woman and mentioned Joseph Murphy and his best-selling book, “Power of the Subconscious Mind.” She asked, “In his book, did he explain why the subconscious doesn’t work for most people?”
That set me back. The subconscious mind is always working, and it responds according to the nature of your thoughts. But one thing can prevent the subconscious from making the changes a person wants. I responded, “Because they don’t work it.”
“Oh,” she replied. “I guess that’s true. Nothing changes if you aren’t willing to work on it.” I quietly sighed, thinking of all the people I knew who didn’t work on an issue, then complained when change didn’t happen.
Most people resist change and it takes effort to overcome that. Inertia can take over, causing you to drift and stalling your progress. It takes determination to pull out of it and move in a different direction. Change doesn’t happen overnight, nor does it happen without applying shifts in thinking and behaving. Your old ways of doing things are simply habits, and can be changed. But it takes attention to alter your course and initiative to put it into action.
Posting affirmation signs around the house won’t help if you don’t repeat the statement frequently. They work by modifying the things you automatically say to yourself. Passively glancing at them without noticing them won’t make much of an impression on your subconscious. You have to be pro-active in impressing the concepts on your inner mind.
Wanting to be more positive won’t work unless you pay attention and change your attitude when you find your thoughts straying into negative territory. Just as you have to turn the car around when you realize you’re going to the gas station when you meant to go to the store, you have to re-focus your attention when your thoughts go in the wrong direction.
Copyright 2012 Linda-Ann Stewart
All Rights Reserved
Reading self-help and personal development books, and listening to CD’s of them, is helpful to expand the awareness of the possibilities for yourself. It also can uplift you and put you in a more constructive mindset. But if you don’t start using some of the tools that you learn about, the improvements won’t last long. You need to create your own foundation so that you can build a strong structure that can withstand the winds of storms.
Here are a few techniques for you to begin with, if you need to start somewhere.
Choose one of these to begin practicing consistently and you’ll notice an improvement in your life in a very short time. It will give you the tool you need to hold onto when life gets a little bumpy. You’ll get through the challenges much more smoothly when you have been making time for your personal development.
Many people drift through life, hoping and assuming things will get better. With that level of belief they tend to experience the average of their mindset. To get better results, they need to think more intentionally. Learn how intentional thinking can keep improving your life.
Copyright 2012 Linda Ann Stewart
All Rights Reserved
by Linda-Ann Stewart
A belief is like a garden. If you throw some seeds into fertile soil, some will take root, sprout and grow. But they need tending or they’ll wither away. You have to water them with new energy, and pluck out the weeds of negative thoughts and inertia. When you attend to your belief and cultivate it, your subconscious will respond with insight, ideas, and inspired action.
Where are you stuck in a past mindset that’s no longer serving you? What assumptions have you made that aren’t valid anymore? Are you coasting in some areas and not putting energy into your life? Start becoming aware of your passive beliefs. How can you shift them into a positive statement of intention and action?
Instead of continuing to smoke, you could say, “I choose to do what I need to that furthers my health,” and find a way to quit smoking. If you’re in debt, you might decide to cut down on expenses, formulate a budget, and work your plan, committed to get out of debt by a certain date. For increased business, believe that you can be successful by investigating new ways to be visible, market and sell.
Don’t allow the garden of your mind to wilt. Be dynamic and fertilize it with new purpose and action. Treat your belief like a living thing. Plant the seeds and make sure the environment is as favorable as possible to encourage them to grow. Nurture them, give them what they need to thrive. They’ll bloom in your life with all the beauty and success you could want.
Affirmation
The Universe wants the good for me that I want for myself: harmony, abundance, health, and joy. I let go of old assumptions that no longer serve me. Now, I cultivate my belief that all good is mine. Insight, ideas, and inspiration flood into my life. I am guided to take action in the direction of my desire. Whatever I need to have a more satisfying life is now provided.
Copyright 2012 Linda Ann Stewart
All Rights Reserved
by Linda-Ann Stewart
Casey never balanced her checkbook. She just assumed she’d have enough for her rent and monthly expenses each month. Although she never knew how much money she had, that didn’t stop her from going out to lunch every day, buying jewelry and going to the movies with her friends. She went through the month with blinders on, avoiding thinking about how she was going to pay for everything.
At the end of the month, she usually could pay her rent only if she didn’t buy groceries for the week. Her assumption that she had enough money wasn’t a strong enough belief to get her over her financial hump.
There’s a difference between an assumption that the best is coming to you and a conviction that it is. An assumption is passive, and doesn’t have much energy behind it. It’s mainly a hope that what you want will come to pass, without much resolution behind it.
On the other end of the spectrum, a conviction is active, a certain knowledge that what you desire will occur. It’s conscious, intentional, focused and supercharges the thought and will. A belief backed with power inspires. It stirs the subconscious to creatively solve problems and find new ways of getting things done.
Too many people float through life, assuming that everything will be the same. But the one constant in the Universe is change. As our environment and we change, we need to keep our beliefs in line with the present.
At the beginning of this century, many people comfortably believed that they would work for one company for their entire career. Shortly thereafter, many jobs were out-sourced and there was a recession. Suddenly, they faced a completely new set of circumstances, and spiraled into fear.
People who make statements like, “Smoking won’t affect my health,” “I’ll eventually be able to pay down my credit cards,” or “I don’t have to upgrade my supplies or my marketing. Customers will come back into stores soon,” aren’t being positive or optimistic. They’re living in denial, avoiding reality. They choose to stay in their comfort zone, even if it’s destroying them. If they recognized the facts, they’d have to be pro-active and change, which they don’t want to make the effort to do.
Many businesses and associations make a similar mistake. They coast on their past success until they run out of juice. Because they haven’t changed with the times, they don’t alter their strategies to find more business or new members. They’re tied to their old mindset, assuming that what used to work is going to continue to work in the same way. But times change, and they need to update the way they do business.
Copyright 2012 Linda Ann Stewart
All Rights Reserved
by Linda-Ann Stewart
Whenever you don’t like a trait in someone else, it’s usually reflecting something within you that you’ve concealed from yourself. It also may be that you recognize the potential for that trait within yourself, and don’t like it. I don’t like people to belittle others, or are cruel. When I hurt someone’s feelings, even unintentionally, it hurts me.
In the past, I would even avoid confronting someone who’d been mean to me because I didn’t want to hurt them. What I finally realized is that the potential to be cruel is within me, as it is within us all, but it’s well hidden. Since I acknowledged that, I can now respond appropriately to someone who is nasty.
You don’t have to act on those attributes you don’t like. But when you find out how the qualities you dislike are expressing in you, and accept them, the energy around them melts away. You no longer have to attract people who are reflecting the parts of you that you’ve masked.
The Universe simply sent them into your life to teach you to accept yourself. All of yourself. Once I began to be true to myself, and convey that to the world, I attracted friends and a partner who were more open with me. The Universe accepts you unconditionally as you are. Wouldn’t you want to accept yourself as much as the Universe does?
Copyright 2001, 2012 Linda Ann Stewart
All Rights Reserved
by Linda-Ann Stewart
Your life and relationships are a perfectly polished mirror for what is in your consciousness. One of the unpopular concepts having to do with this is, “When you don’t like something in someone else, it’s reflecting something within yourself that you don’t like.” You might have heard about this spiritual principle, and wondered about it, as I did. How could it be? I didn’t like people to be deceptive or cruel. Did that mean that somehow I was being that way? Try as I might, I couldn’t see that in myself. It took many years of observation and contemplation before I finally made some sense out of it.
Some years ago, I was involved with a couple of men who were deceptive and manipulative. These are two characteristics that immediately offend me. However, while I was in the relationships, I wasn’t aware that they were expressing these traits, even when they lied to me. After the second relationship, I decided it couldn’t be a coincidence that I’d attract the same type of man one right after another.
So I began to explore where I might be deceptive and manipulative. What I discovered was that I was deceiving the world about who I was. I was hiding great chunks of myself, afraid of being criticized or rejected. I wasn’t lying to others, the way these men had been. Instead, I was lying to myself.
That’s when I began to understand the principle. A person doesn’t have to be expressing the disliked attribute in the same way. For instance, two friends each have an issue with time. One of the friends is chronically late, and the other is obsessively early. The issue is the same, but they are presenting different facets of it. I know this to be true, as I’ve had friends who are always late, and I’m almost always early.
Copyright 2001, 2012 Linda Ann Stewart
All Rights Reserved
by Linda-Ann Stewart
Ned identified with being “obnoxious.” He hid a sensitive nature under a brash and aggressive act. Even when he could see the advantages of being calmer, he refused to change his ways because he was tied to his label. It provided him with a sense of power, belonging and security. And, because of it, he offended and alienated people he liked.
There’s usually a lot of emotional energy applied when you label yourself. Shame, anger, sadness, fear, insecurity and frustration can all play a role.
If you call yourself a “nervous” person, then whenever your heart jumps will feed into that belief. You might avoid any exciting experiences for fear of the repercussions. Your world will become smaller and you’ll have less opportunity to grow. Instead, to begin to open up to a greater potential, you could simply recognize your increased heart rate as a normal response to an unexpected event.
Labels come from beliefs, attitudes or actions that have been performed over and over until they have become habits. The good news is that those same beliefs, attitudes and behaviors can be changed. Start by recognizing the labels you’ve given yourself. Notice how you feel about them and about changing them.
If you’re really uncomfortable about letting them go, it indicates how invested you are in them. They may have become excuses so you’re not expected to excel or change. You may feel they keep you safe. Reappraise your labels to discern if they’re serving you now, or preventing you from expressing more of who you are.
This is where categorizing can help because you can use it to decide what to do to change. Identify what beliefs, attitudes, actions and behaviors need to be adjusted to eliminate the label. Start with one small change that you can commit to doing. When you get that one accomplished and stable, choose another change and work on it.
By releasing the labels you limit yourself with, you’ll be opening up the possibility for growth and expansion for yourself. Your horizons will be wider, and you’ll feel better about yourself. All you need to do is believe in yourself and your potential.
Affirmation
I know that I’m more than the labels I’ve given myself. They’re only beliefs that I’ve allowed to become habits. The Universe believes so much more about me, and wants to give me greater good than I’ve accepted. I now assess the labels attached to me, and open my mind to understand why they got established. Divine Guidance directs me to the steps I need to change, and helps me to commit to living up to my potential.
Copyright 2012 Linda Ann Stewart
All Rights Reserved