Stop Worrying And Be Happy
by Linda-Ann Stewart
When I was a child, my mother called me a “worrywart.” I was concerned about everything, from the well being of my friends, my parents dying (a normal childhood fear) to whether we were going to have a nuclear war (not normal for someone aged seven). There was very little I could change about these situations, but that didn’t stop me from trying to figure out what I might do. Worry gave me the illusion of having some control over these circumstances.
From childhood, we’re taught to worry about our lives, the people around us, the state of the world. Mom would say, “Of course I’m worried about you, I care about you.” We then patterned ourselves on that model of caring. As children, if we worried about our grades, or about doing something wrong, then the adults considered that we were more mature. Our society perceives people who worry to be more earnest, responsible, or concerned about conditions. If we don’t show our apprehension about a serious situation, people sometimes perceive us as being flighty, a dreamer, not connected with reality, or worst of all (to them) – “an optimist.”
Worry Is Wasteful
But worry is a useless waste of energy. Most of what we worry about can’t be impacted by our being anxious about it. So far, we haven’t had a nuclear war, so I wasted all those hours reading the Civil Defense pamphlets on how to “duck and cover” and how to make a fallout shelter. Taking realistic actions (if there are any) to prepare for a future event is one thing, obsessing over it after we’ve done what we can or over what we can’t change is another. And because the subconscious follows the conscious mind’s lead, it figures if we’re worrying, we must want more to be apprehensive about.
When we worry, we’re simply living in fear. And FEAR stands for “False Evidence Appearing Real.” Fear of a possibility that may, but generally doesn’t, happen. If there is an outcome that is ordained (such as our getting older or inflation), nothing we can do will change it and we might as well enjoy each moment of life.
Mentally chewing a possibility over and over, and not allowing ourselves to have fun because maybe something bad might happen, is a waste of time and energy. Worry is immobilizing. It actually keeps us from being productive, efficient, and pro-active in the present. Universal energy is diverted to a cycle of anxiety instead of into being more creative and finding solutions.
The Habit of Worry
Worry can become a habit, and gives us an illusion of control over circumstances beyond our influence. We can only change our responses and ourselves. Some chronic worriers, in quiet times of happiness, will actually spoil it with an anxious thought of “What should I be worrying about?” I almost superstitiously felt that if I worried, the feared outcome wouldn’t materialize. Finally, I realized that I could more effectively use positive affirmations to bring out the best.
End the Cycle of Worry
The good news is that this habit can be broken. Remember what The Serenity Prayer teaches. “God grant me the serenity accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” The challenge is to “know the difference.”
Start writing down your concerns. This brings them into a more rational frame of mind, and you can assess their reality. Challenge them with the idea, “How likely is it that this will happen?” If it is a possibility, what’s the worst that can happen, and what would you do? Can you change the situation? If not, every time you begin to chew on it, remind yourself that you will deal with it if it happens. Find an affirmation that helps reinforce something positive happening.
I still occasionally find myself worrying about things, generally when I’m really stressed. But for the most part, I’ve broken the habit. In doing so, I’ve released more positive energy into my life. As the song says, “Don’t Worry, Be Happy.”
Affirmation:
Most of what I worry about never happens, so I end the wasteful cycle of worry. I recognize what I can change and what I can’t, and release those conditions beyond my control to the Infinite. Universal Mind guides me into making the best decisions about what I can change. Only good comes to me, as Divine Right Action takes place in every area of my life. I allow myself to enjoy happiness.
As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity.To boost productivity and reduce overwhelm, register for her FREE guide, Design Your Best Day, at https://www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html You can contact her at LAS@Linda-AnnStewart.com or 928-600-0452.
