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Tip the Scales Towards the Positive

Tip the Scales Towards the Positive

When there’s a tragedy, you may resist feeling good because you think it’s inappropriate. But this is the most important time for you to focus on the good in your life. Doing so builds resiliency to handle difficult times. Learn a powerful technique that allows you to create more strength and empowerment for good times and bad. Watch Tip the Scales Towards the Positive.

Transcript:

Sometimes, when bad things have happened, such as a tragedy in the world or in your personal life, you might feel guilty for feeling upbeat. You might think it’s selfish, inappropriate or that you don’t deserve to.

This is common and natural, but doesn’t help you or anyone else. It just perpetuates the negativity, undermining your strength and reducing your ability to handle the situation. This is really the most important time for you to focus on what is good in your life.

When you pay attention to the good things in your life, you tip the scales toward feeling better. This results in more happiness and well being for you, more kindness and compassion towards others. You’ll have more resources to draw from to deal with the tragedy and when other upsetting experiences do occur.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart and I empower people to focus and align their heart with their vision so they can achieve their goals. I’d like to share with you how you can give yourself a well of resilience to draw from in good times and bad. This is a technique I use in my life and it’s served me well.

Neuroscience tells us that “neurons that fire together, wire together.” That means that the more you focus on the positive, the more neurons you build in the areas of encouragement, empowerment, and inspiration.

To stimulate your neurons to create more positive emotions, when you find  something pleasant in your life, let it fill you up. Instead of just thinking of it  for a few seconds, which, don’t get me wrong, is good, spend 20-30 seconds focusing on it.

Feel it, savor it. Let it pour through you like a warm glow, or golden liquid. I will often stop with the intention to take time to relish a scene or experience  to allow the joy and serenity of it to imprint on my memory.

The longer you dwell on the pleasant  experience and allow it to stimulate gratifying emotions, the stronger and more powerful the your positive neurons become.

I suggest practicing this several times a day. The more often you do this, the more you build a net of positive neurons that can support and nourish you in tough times.

Thank you for watching. If you enjoyed this video, please like my YouTube channel and click the bell to be notified of future videos about mindset, motivation and empowerment. Until next time, stay focused.

Read the accompanying article, Find the Good in Your Life.

Defuse the Power of Negative Thinking

Defuse the Power of Negative Thinking

by Linda-Ann Stewart

"We are what we think about all day long." Ralph Waldo Emerson

“We are what we think about all day long.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

What do you tend to think about all day? Is your awareness focused on beneficial, enriching thoughts or are you mainly thinking discouraging, undermining ideas and telling yourself that “I can’t?” The subconscious follows the tendency of your thoughts, and manifests the average of what you ponder during the day. If the overall quality of your thoughts is positive and uplifting, then the subconscious moves in that direction, and the converse is true.

It’s not easy to think positively every moment of every day. I’m not even sure it’s possible. But the subconscious doesn’t need you to be continuously constructive. It just needs you to be more positive than negative for it to create more harmony. But many people fear their negative thoughts, and that very fear gives those thoughts more energy.

Thought Is Creative

Each thought is potentially creative and is formed of energy. When a person recognizes they’ve considered a negative idea, many times they feel guilty for doing so, and become afraid that it will overcome any positive thoughts. Instead of simply switching their attention to something more beneficial, they continue to spiral downwards, and the negative thought takes on a life of its own. 

For instance, consider a baseball player who has missed every pitch in a game. Instead of figuring he just had a bad game, or the pitcher was especially good, he might begin to doubt his abilities. During practice, and the next game, he’ll tense up and worry too much about hitting the ball. He may recognize the tendency of his thinking, and try to overcome it. But now he’s fighting on two fronts. He’s concerned about not hitting the ball and fearful that his thinking is going to become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Once he begins to worry, and not trust his abilities, problems arise.

Your Subconscious Programs

Many times, the limiting, negative thoughts are simply a part of the subconscious trying to protect you and keep you safe. You might hear that little voice in your head saying:

  • If you don’t try, then you won’t fail, right?
  • By expecting the worst, you won’t be disappointed when it happens.
  • If you don’t succeed, then people won’t expect more of you.

This little voice is part of the subconscious mind using fear, doubt, and worry as a way to keep you from growing and moving forward. As long as you’re in familiar territory, then it figures nothing bad will happen.

It’s simply doing its job, repeating what it’s been programmed to do. So instead of vilifying it, resisting the negative thoughts and fearing their power, change your way of responding to them. When you become aware of a negative idea, simply say, “Thank you.” This immediately defuses the power you attach to the negative thought. You’re acknowledging its attempt to help, instead of rebelling against it. State, “Thank you, but that’s no longer helpful,” and respond with a beneficial concept.

How to Deal with Negative Thoughts

A long time ago, I learned a powerful way of dealing with negative thoughts. Divide a paper in half, write your affirmative goal on the left side, and record any objection that comes to mind on the right side, and then reply with “Thank you.” By writing down its concerns, and then acknowledging it with a “Thank you,” you’re letting the subconscious mind know that you recognize its distress. On the next line, write your goal again, and then any negative response, and “Thank you.” Continue until you don’t notice any negative thoughts about it coming into your mind.

Eventually, it will cease to bother you with protests, because you’ve let it know you’ve heard it, but are still going to move in that new direction. You’ve taken back your power. It will respect that, because that’s its true goal. As long as you accept your own authority in directing your life, the critical voice will quiet down. And you can now put your attention on what it is you want in your life, without wasting your energy resisting your negative thoughts.

Affirmation:

Negative thoughts are simply outdated ideas that I accepted sometime in the past. They are no longer valid or necessary to help me. Whenever I recognize myself dwelling on a negative concept, I remember that it’s simply my subconscious mind concerned about me. I respond with “Thank you, but it’s safe for me to experience progress.” I accept that I am the authority in my life and now take back my power.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity.To achieve your goals with confidence and ease in 4 powerful steps, register for her FREE training video and accompanying action planning guide at www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/setyourcourse.html. You can contact her at LAS@Linda-AnnStewart.com or 928-600-0452.

Train Yourself to Be Positive

Train Yourself to Be Positive

It’s normal to pay more attention to negative situations than positive. But if you view everything in your life through this filter, you could become anxious and depressed. Fortunately, you can counterbalance this attitude so you’re more positive, happier with greater well being. Learn 2 tried and true methods to train yourself to be more positive and better deal with distressing situations that occur.

Transcript:

Did you know humans have a natural tendency to pay more attention to negative situations than positive? It’s called the Negativity Bias. It’s purpose is to help you survive and keep you safe. But if you view everything in your life through this filter, it no longer is being helpful.

Fortunately, you can counterbalance this ancient attitude so you’re not as affected by it. When you do, you’ll be happier, have greater well being and be more resourceful in dealing with the upsetting situations in your life.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart and I empower people to focus and align their heart with their vision so they can achieve their goals.

I’d like to share two ways to change from being distressed to having a more positive frame of mind. By practicing these tactics each day, you’ll begin to inoculate your mind against dwelling on the negative.

The first tactic is to shift your attention from a negative mindset to something more uplifting. Write down positive things that have happened to you during the day. It could be as simple as traffic being lighter than expected, finding a close parking space, or a phone call going well.

Think of the small things that went right, such as your victories and what you accomplished. Do this every day and soon it will become a habit to notice them as your day progresses. This trains your brain to seek out the positive.

A second tactic is slightly different from the first, though they could be combined. Write down five things you’re grateful for every day. This is a tried and true method to begin to train yourself to be more optimistic overall. Studies have shown multiple benefits from consistently keeping a gratitude journal.

The  items you’re grateful for could be more general than the specific things that went right in your day. For instance, it could be that you’re grateful for your health, how the day was productive, or for the friends in your life. But, like I said, gratitudes could combine with thinking about what went right in your day and then being thankful for each one.

Either, or both of these tactics together, will improve your life in multiple ways. They will help from seeking out the positive becoming automatic, to being less affected when negative things do occur, to just being more productive. You’ll notice that you feel better about yourself and have a better outlook on life.

Thank you for watching. If you enjoyed this video, please like my YouTube channel and click the bell to be notified of future videos. Stay focused.

Read the accompanying article, Find the Good in Your Life.

Find the Good in Your Life

Find the Good in Your Life

Linda-Ann Stewart

Have you ever had someone rudely jump ahead of you in line at the grocery store, and it soured your mood for hours? Or had someone make a spiteful remark, and it ruined your day? Even if the rest of the day was pleasant, you likely dwelled on the annoying encounter and were sensitized to notice more irritations afterwards. This is a natural occurrence.

People are primed to notice more negative things than positive. Your brain was designed to help you survive, and does so by detecting threats to your life. If your ancestors hadn’t registered that the tiger was about to pounce on them, they wouldn’t have survived to pass their genes onto you.

Nowadays, there aren’t as many physical dangers, but the mind doesn’t distinguish between what might kill you and what disturbs you emotionally or mentally. The brain perceives them all as potential threats and spotlights what’s upsetting to you so it can try to help you survive.

The Negativity Effect

Scientists call this the Negativity Bias or Effect. Humans are more inclined to recognize and remember the negative, and brush off the positive. It’s the brain and subconscious mind’s effort to keep you safe.

It’s not an issue if it only happens once in a while, such as from an unpleasant encounter. But if you get stuck in viewing the world through this dark lens, it adversely impacts how you think and react in other areas. You only perceive what’s wrong, and can become cynical, irritable and depressed.  

You need to be careful as this primal characteristic can overwhelm your life. If you’re always braced for something to go wrong, you’re predisposed to overreact to minor upsets or annoyances, and you notice them more. At the same time, you don’t recognize the good in your life.

You’re always in a fight or flight mode, stressed, anxious and exhausted. If this is the case, you don’t have enough resources to think clearly or be creative. You automatically react like you did in the past, without considering other alternatives.

Why It’s Important to Overcome This Tendency

The more you focus on what bothers you, the more incidents you notice, and this mindset becomes a habit. This ingrained attitude can lead you to expect the worst in people and situations, and can adversely affect your relationships. Your actions follow your beliefs and attention, so you could unwittingly create the very conditions that would confirm your pessimistic expectations.

Fortunately, you’re not a captive to this ancient bias. You can counteract your brain’s predisposition to lean to the negative by training yourself to pay attention to what’s good in your life. This will balance out that primeval tendency to always be on alert for threats. You have the power to decide how much of an impact unpleasant situations will have on you.

Instead of getting sucked into a negative frame of mind, you can train yourself to notice what’s good in your life. It takes time and practice, but when you persist in developing this skill, annoyances will bother you less overall. You may be aware of the irritations, but they won’t trigger you to fall into a well of cynicism.

What You Focus on Grows

As you begin to pay attention to what’s going well in your life, you’ll discover there’s more that’s good than you originally thought. What you focus on grows in your awareness and your subconscious mind will begin to scan your environment for other positive aspects.

Scientists say that “neurons that fire together, wire together.” If you dwell on the negative, you grow more brain cells that create discouragement, depression and helplessness. This is how pessimists are created. However, when you focus on the positive, brain cells grow in the areas for happiness, wellbeing and resourcefulness. Doing this develops optimists.

The One to Five Ratio

Scientists say that, in a relationship, it takes between four and five positive interactions to overcome a single negative one. If you’ve had an unpleasant disagreement with a friend, you’ll need several amicable exchanges with them to feel comfortable with them again. I think the same might be true of events. When you’ve experienced a distressing situation and it has soured your mood, it may take four to five pleasant incidents to improve your outlook.

You can be more proactive to start to feel better. Shortly after you’re upset, irritated or annoyed, find five things you’re grateful for in your life. Or seek out five items that make you happy in the moment. They can be small pleasures, like a flower, clouds floating in a blue sky or a child’s laugh. This will balance out the negativity, and help you shake off the unpleasantness you encountered.

Creating a New Brain Pattern.

You don’t have to let upsets or irritations control your overall mood or mindset. As you deliberately seek out more of the positive, you establish a new pattern in your brain. You create more positive leaning brain cells. By training yourself to pay attention to what’s positive, negative situations will bother you less. You won’t waste mental energy on minor negative incidents. They’ll reduce in importance, and you’ll increase your ability to handle them.

Not only that, you’ll be able to recognize more possibilities that you would have ignored before. Because you’re more open to them, your subconscious will search your environment for opportunities that benefit you. To uplift your entire life and overcome your ancient bias to be negative, spend time to enjoy pleasant moments and rewire your brain to be happy.

Affirmation:

I have the power and ability to choose where to put my attention. When I focus on more positive thoughts, I know that it impacts my life in a beneficial way. I become aware of when I start to slide into negativity, and decide to notice what’s good in my life. As I seek out the positive, I establish a new pattern within my mind that leans to optimism. This opens my mind to greater wellbeing and happiness.

Watch the accompanying video, Train Yourself to Be Positive.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity. Register for her FREE guide to Design Your Best Day at www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html. You can also contact her at LAS@Linda-AnnStewart.com or 928-600-0452.

Will I be optimistic in 3 weeks?

Will I be optimistic in 3 weeks?

Question about affirmations

Question: If I say an affirmation for three weeks, will I see results and think only positive thoughts by then?

Answer: If you begin saying a positive affirmation, and say it consistently every day for three weeks, you’ll notice an improvement in your attitude. However, you’ll need to catch each negative thought and idea and change it to a positive for the results to be most effective.

And you won’t have a permanent change in your thoughts after just three weeks. You’ll need to keep up with the affirmation, and transforming your negative thoughts even after that. But the negative thoughts will be fewer and you’ll be more positive overall.

This isn’t something you can do for a few days, weeks or months and then stop doing. It’s a focused change of thinking that must continue. You won’t have to be as diligent later on, because you’ll be more aware of your negative thoughts and automatically change them to positives. Affirmations aren’t magic. You have to use them consistently for them to work.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Podcast Interview – Mindset, Vision, Focus

Podcast Interview – Mindset, Vision, Focus

Janice Porter and I met in a networking group and shortly thereafter had a Zoom call to get to know each other better. She’s a Relationship Marketing Specialist and an amazing LinkedIn trainer, who gave me some tips on my LinkedIn profile, which I followed. She’s all about relationship building, online and offline, to grow your business and turn your connections into clients and referral partners. Relationships are so important to her that she has a podcast called Relationships Rule.

We hit it off in our call and, as a result, she asked me to be a guest on her podcast, to talk about focus and how it’s so easy to get scattered. It was a delightful conversation, wandering from how she struggles with being scattered to tips on how to stay focused to mindset to how success begins within. We even discussed whether I believe curiosity is innate or not.

We both are very curious people and it can take us both down rabbit holes. I can spend hours exploring an idea. She has a similar challenge. These tangents don’t help us when we’re trying to accomplish something. I gave her a suggestion, which I use, which can make sure our curiosity doesn’t undermine our goals.

We had a meandering conversation, but kept coming back to focus. We explored tactics to keep yourself focused. She also brought up that she didn’t really like to establish vision and goals. I explained why they’re beneficial and how you can create them in a way that will work with the subconscious mind.

As we discussed mindset, we explored how it’s more than positive thinking. It’s much more global than just optimism. We both weren’t so positive when we were younger and now choose to be positive. It is a choice about how to perceive a situation.

I mentioned how television news engages our emotions, which means it sends us into a light state of hypnosis. This can mean you accept what’s being said without analyzing it. I suggested to read news items, as you can be more objective.

We touched on the subject of believing in yourself. If you don’t believe in yourself, it’s a good bet you’ll sabotage your goals and dreams. She asked what I noticed when someone started to believe in themselves. They immediately change their actions, and start getting better results.

At her request, I gave my last piece of advice.  Focus is a skill you can develop. You can learn how to practice focusing and how to do train yourself to do so. We knew we could have continued our conversation, but unfortunately, our time was limited and we had to end it there.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Sparks of Insight

Sparks of Insight

Sparks of Insight

Your subconscious mind acts on the overall direction of your thinking. If you’re 51% positive during the day, then that tendency overrides the 49% of the negative thoughts you’ve had. The converse is also true. The good news is that you only have to be a little more positive than negative to experience the benefits and have the negative of that day be erased. So every time you catch yourself having a negative thought, deliberately find something to be grateful for or insert an upbeat thought. It takes discipline and awareness, but it’s worth it.  

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Book Review-Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy

Book Review-Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy

Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy
by David Burns, MD

Here’s a book that gives specific instructions on how to change the way you think about your life. It was created to help people erase depression, anxiety, procrastination, guilt, pessimism, as well as perfectionism, anger, stress and low self-esteem. And it works. In a study of people with clinical depression, 70-75% of them were “cured” three months after reading this book and following the exercises.

By becoming aware of what you think, and then either addressing it or disputing the reasons, you begin to change the mental processes that have sabotaged you. Many people resist writing down their thoughts, for various reasons, but doing so allows you to view them more dispassionately. No longer are you controlled by your moods or negative thinking, you are empowered to confront it and change it.

Awareness and claiming your authority are key. When you take the time and effort to pay attention to what you’re thinking and write it down, you’re taking control. Then, by responding to it rationally, more positively, you’re accepting your authority over your own thoughts. This will begin to change your life.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Focus On What You Want

Focus On What You Want

by Linda-Ann Stewart

In my hypnotherapy practice, when I worked with smokers to help them quit, I told them that if they’re having a hard time giving it up, it’s because for years they’ve told themselves that “I can’t quit,” or “It’s going to be hard.” The subconscious has accepted that declaration and is making sure that it’s giving them what it thinks they want. Even if they’ve made a different decision (to quit), the inner mind is simply obeying the concept with the most energy attached to it.

What have you been unwittingly telling your subconscious? “I’m not good enough,” “I can’t win,” “There isn’t enough (whatever) to go around,” “I can’t find a romantic partner,” “There isn’t enough business,” “There’s a scarcity of jobs,” “I can’t find what I want.” These conclusions are instructions to the subconscious, and it must act on them.

There’s an old saying, “Energy flows where attention goes.” Wherever your attention is, whatever you’ve been focusing on, the subconscious will create a mold for that belief and make it real. It doesn’t matter whether you’ve been concentrating on what you want, or what you don’t want,  a desire or a fear. The subconscious can’t discern between positive or negative emotion. It simply recognizes the force of the energy, associates it with the image or concept you’re dwelling on, and thinks, “They must want this or else they wouldn’t have spent so much time thinking about it.” Energy (emotion) plus image (concept) equals result (your experience).

The subconscious is also quite literal. I told smokers that they needed to keep their attention on their desired result. Instead of focusing on quitting smoking, they needed to keep thinking about being a nonsmoker. I’ve known many people who have quit smoking, only to begin again a few weeks or months later because their stated goal was to “Quit smoking.” Once they’d stopped, their subconscious figured, “Okay, we’ve achieved that goal. Now let’s start smoking again so that we get to accomplish it again.”

The same is true for weight reduction. So many people focus on releasing a certain amount of weight, only to regain it again. Their attention was on the activity of reduction instead of eating and exercising for the weight they wanted to be. The subconscious is only doing what it thinks you want. You have to be specific and focus on the end result instead of the steps to get there. The steps are necessary to break the objective down into goals that can be readily accomplished.

This principle applies to every aspect of your life. Do you want a greater income? Instead contemplating the lack of money (which the subconscious perceives to be your aim), fill your mind with the amount you want and how your life will change. If you want a relationship, instead of complaining there you can’t meet anyone you like (the subconscious will make sure you don’t), realize that there are countless number of people to choose from.

Break your objective into attainable steps, small ones you can easily accomplish. And keep your mind on the eventual goal. What do you need to change to achieve it? For instance, a smoker needs to develop new coping skills, as does anyone reducing weight. For greater abundance, do you need to become more visible and network? For a relationship, find ways to meet people of like mind.

Instead of focusing on the lack or blocks to what you want (which the subconscious will misunderstand as instructions), place your attention on the solution and take the actions  necessary to get there. Universal energy will flow in, and even if you don’t know how you’ll achieve your objective, you’ll be guided in the right direction. Remember, your subconscious mind will work just as hard to give you what you want as it will to give you what you don’t want. What you concentrate on and then receive from Life is up to you.

Affirmation:

I become aware of the negative messages I’ve been telling myself. Recognizing that they are outdated and that I want to change them, I find a way to open my mind to the possibilities. I now focus on what it is that I do want. As I identify the positive changes that my goal will manifest in my life, I take the actions necessary to bring about the change I desire. My subconscious finds the way to bring it about, and the Universe guides and directs me in the right direction.

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~ Linda-Ann Stewart