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Be Authentic by Walking Your Talk

Be Authentic by Walking Your Talk

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by Linda-Ann Stewart

woman's shoes walking away

Several years ago, an acquaintance told me she’d just been to a conference with many spiritual and personal development speakers. At the reception, she was especially delighted to meet one of her idols. His core message was to be present with the person you were with and to make that person feel important.

He greeted her by looking into her eyes and saying, “You’re very important to me.” But as she spoke to him, his eyes wandered the room, and a few moments later he excused himself. He walked over to greet someone else with the same phrase. She was completely disenchanted by his hypocrisy. He didn’t walk his talk, and lost a devoted follower.

What Authenticity Is and What It Isn’t

When a person’s actions don’t align with what they claim is important to them, this causes others to distrust them. This is true in personal and professional relationships. People are attracted to those who are authentic. Authenticity consists of being sincere, genuine, and living according to your values.

However, if you’re having a bad day or are in a difficult mood, authenticity doesn’t require you to share it with your boss, your customer, or the grocery clerk. That would be counterproductive. It could overwhelm them or cause them to feel uncomfortable. Those in your outer circle crave consistency, reliability and professionalism.

Being True to Yourself

Being connected to your principles allows you to decide how to be present with the different people and situations in your life. When you’re authentic, it denotes that you’re being true to yourself and what you believe in. It increases your credibility to others. In personal relationships, after you’ve built a foundation of trust, it’s appropriate to be vulnerable and reveal more of yourself.

When your words and deeds match, and you follow through on promises and intentions, you establish your integrity. This gives people the message that it’s safe to depend on you. As you walk your talk, you fit your actions to your words. As a result, it instills in you a deep sense of confidence, self-esteem, happiness and inner peace. What values are most important to you and how can you best honor them?

Affirmation:

When I am authentic, then I am being a clear channel for the Universe to flow through me. I choose to live according to my deepest values. By aligning my words and my deeds, I build trust. As I follow through on my promises and intentions, I establish integrity. By being true to myself, I am true to others, as well.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity.To boost productivity and reduce overwhelm, register for her FREE guide, Design Your Best Day, at https://www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html

Commit To A Path, Part 1

Commit To A Path, Part 1

by Linda-Ann Stewart

Some years ago, Sally and Terri discussed partnering to present a workshop. Initially, Terri was excited and they started the preliminary planning. As Sally began putting ideas together, Terri stopped returning her calls. Sally moved forward on the project, thinking that Terri had just gotten busy.

But as time went on, and details needed to be finalized, it became imperative for Sally to connect with Terri. Eventually, Terri called and said, “I don’t think I’m the right person for this. I kept putting off letting you know because I didn’t want to let you down.” All the time and work Sally had put into the project was for nothing, simply because Terri wouldn’t let Sally know she’d changed her mind.

Because Terri hadn’t wanted to disappoint Sally, she hadn’t been honest with her. If she’d let Sally know when she’d first come to that conclusion, it would have saved Sally hours of work and frustration. Instead of disappointing her, Terri would have freed her to look for another partner. But the delay undermined/scuttled the entire project.

Have you ever know someone to do this? They agreed to help, participate, or volunteer, but then changed their mind? Then they disappeared because they didn’t want to let the coordinator down. By being unavailable, they hoped that the planner would get the message that they didn’t want to do it. They didn’t want to look like a bad guy by making the break and hoped the coordinator would move on to someone else. They acted this way because they didn’t want to deal with the coordinator’s disappointment.

The reality was that their actions weren’t making it easier on the coordinator, but harder. They held the coordinator hostage, not letting them move on to find someone else or make other plans. They avoided confronting the issue because they didn’t want to deal with the guilt of not living up to their agreement and the discomfort of communicating this to the coordinator.

Do you ever do this, to yourself or others? Have you ever said “Yes” to doing something, but didn’t really want to do it? And then you avoided communicating your true decision? Have you ever wanted to end a relationship, and rather than making a clean break, tried leaving clues? Unfortunately, if you did, the other person just ended up confused and frustrated.

This lack of communications makes life difficult for the other person and for you. The result isn’t that the problem magically disappears, but that the other person is confused. And you wind up looking like the bad guy. People will stop asking you to be involved in projects, not because you lack the ability, but because they no longer trust you.

Copyright 2013 Linda Ann Stewart
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