Aug 102017
 

by Linda-Ann Stewart

For awhile on my Facebook Business page, someone I knew made belittling and insulting comments. From his remarks, it was obvious he had read only the title of my post, didn’t have any knowledge of the topic nor had read the content. Over time, instead of consistently sharing an idea or article to serve my audience, I posted less and less. My unconscious motivation was to avoid his harassment and not subject my other readers to his attacks. This action was not in my best interest and sabotaged my efforts to share subjects of interest with my followers.

MotivationAre your actions matching up with what you want? Mine weren’t. If not, it’s time to look at what’s motivating you and compare it to the outcomes you desire. That’s what I had to do, once I became aware of what I was doing. To eliminate the aggravation, I banned him from the page. Since it’s public, he can read the page but he can’t interact on it.

Napoleon Hill said, “Your every act is the result of a given cause—your motives.” Your motivation may come from earlier in your life, and you haven’t updated it to support you in the present day. Mine came from childhood when I didn’t want to offend anyone. This time, I decided it was better to risk upsetting this one person than it was to stop reaching out to my followers.

The motivation you had when you were younger may have been beneficial, but the way you execute it now isn’t working for you. For instance, being a class clown brought Joe good attention in high school, but interferes with his job as an adult. Instead of entertaining his boss, he gets written up for distracting his coworkers and not meeting his deadlines. His motivation is to get acknowledgement, but the behavior isn’t fulfilling its purpose anymore.

Or consider when the football star was a bully in high school, it brought him admiration. But in his life now, it doesn’t get him respect, which is what he craves. Instead, he alienates the very people he wants to impress.

Conversely, good intentions can lead to bad results. The grade A student in school, who kept her head down and studied hard, got good grades in school. Teachers praised her for being so quiet and unassuming. But as an adult, it keeps her from taking credit for her work or putting herself forward for advancement.

And then there’s the big sister who was commended for taking care of her younger siblings. But now, when she takes care of everyone, they deplete her energy and bank account. Both of these women had positive motivations and behaviors that were appropriate when they were young. But when they got older, the same type of actions no longer benefited them.

Most motivations operate unconsciously. You’re not aware of why you’re doing what you’re doing. Your motivation may be valid, but the way you fulfill it may be an outdated remnant of the past. It’s important to get clear on the reason that’s driving your actions so you can obtain the outcomes you want.

To recognize where you may be sabotaging yourself, and how to get your motives and actions aligned, explore these suggestions.

1. Are you disappointed, puzzled or confused about why you’re not getting the outcomes you expect? This is a signal that something is amiss. Awareness is the first step, because before you can resolve a situation, you have to acknowledge there’s a problem.

2. Examine your actions. What results have they brought you in the past, and are they bringing similar ones now? If not, then there’s a mismatch between your behavior and your desired outcome. It’s tempting to just change your actions without going deeper. But at the first sign of stress, it’s normal to return to the behavior that’s familiar. Discover what your incentive is so you can stay on track.

3. Assess the purpose behind your action. What is it trying to do for you? It may be trying to protect you or bring you recognition. You may be trying to avoid something uncomfortable, through procrastination or a search for perfection. Or you could be seeking to attract something better into your life, such as acknowledgement or friends. That reason steers your impulses.

4. Now that you know your motivation, how can you modify your beliefs and actions to receive your desired outcome? Once you’ve understood what you need to change, you have a better chance of success. Whenever you get stressed, remind yourself of why you’re changing your habits and stick to it.

Unconscious ideas and urges create situations that you don’t expect. When you get clear on your motives, you can then intentionally change the way you’re fulfilling them. It’s never easy to break with the past, but you have a greater chance of success when you clarify your reasons.

Affirmation:
I now get clear on the motives for my actions. If the way I fulfill that purpose no longer serves me, I set my intention to change it. The Universe completely supports me in my efforts to improve my life.

Watch the accompanying Coaching Tip video Are You in Alignment with Your Motivation?

As a speaker, hypnotherapist, and vision coach, Linda-Ann Stewart helps business and professional women who feel stuck, immobilized and overwhelmed to create their vision, prioritize, and focus so they increase their productivity, prosperity and peace of mind. If you'd like some help to reach your goals, email her at LAS@Linda-AnnStewart.com with "Complimentary Consultation" in the subject line.
Jul 282017
 

Sparks of Insight“Things turn out best for the people who make the best out of the way things turn out.” ~ Art Linkletter

This is a gentle way of saying “When life hands you lemons, make lemonade.” Successful people find opportunities in difficulties, and many times, these become their greatest achievements. Challenges abound, and are a way to make us grow and expand. When a challenge comes your way, make the best of it. In so doing, you’re giving your subconscious the direction to become more resourceful at attracting Universal good.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Jul 282017
 

Woman with outstretched arms 9 Things That Make You Unlikable
Being likeable is something that you can cultivate within yourself, and can improve your performance. Being unlikable can create problems with your relationships and the way people perceive you. But some characteristics can sneak up on you. Learn what they are and how you can change them.

Meditation For Beginners: 11 Easy Tips
Numerous studies show amazing benefits for your mind, body and spirit. It reduces stress and makes you more productive. But many people don’t know how to begin this valuable practice. Here are some great tips to use to begin meditating.

Can Optimism Boost Women’s Lives?
A recent study of 70,000 women found that optimism reduces their risk of dying of all sorts of diseases by 30%. This article explores the ways these women express their optimism and how it affects their decisions. Optimism can be learned, and this article points to some ways that it can improve your life.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Jul 252017
 

More than 99 percent of adults experience the fears of failure and rejection. They are often times caught in the trap of feeling, “I can’t, but I have to.” It affects everything from your professional to your personal life. In this video, sales trainer shares his proven 4 step formula for overcoming these fears and changing your attitude from negative to positive.

To discover your current level of self-confidence and how to take action toward building greater confidence in yourself, take Brian Tracy’s Self-Confidence Assessment.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Jul 202017
 

Sunset Crater, Flagstaff AZIf You Have These 6 Struggles, You’re Highly Intelligent
Highly intelligent people aren’t super beings, who have magic powers to figure out everything. They struggle with problems and like everyone does. It’s just that their challenges may be a bit different from the average person. This article examines the specific issues that these folk experience.

Stop Sabotaging Yourself And Achieve Success
Unfortunately, we tend to be our own worst enemies. We tend to travel in familiar paths, even when they undermine our goals. Success is affected more by our mental attitudes than than our actions. This article includes 3 tips on how to defeat self-sabotage.

Happiness research shows the biggest obstacle to creativity is being too busy
Our lives are getting busier by the day. And that busyness blocks our creativity. Creativity blooms when our minds are idle, wandering or daydreaming. This article explains how to maximize your ability to learn complex tasks and be more creative. Learn how to give your brain a break.

Jul 142017
 

Grand Canyon Sunset - East of Yaki Point15 Small Things You Can Do Every Day To Become Highly Successful
Success doesn’t come when you do one big thing. It comes from the habits and routines you do every day. When you’re intentional about how you spend your time and where you expend your energy, you’ll find your way to success. Learn some of the most valuable things you can do to improve your chances.

How Fake Friends Cause Anxiety And Sabotage Your Success
Do you remember the old platitude, “Birds of a feather flock together”? It’s true. You tend to associate with people who are like you, but you also become like the people you associate with. Being friends with supportive people not only improves your attitude, increases your chances of success. This article gives some clear suggestions on the type of person to avoid if you want to have a happier and more successful life.

5 Habits That Psychologists Link With Happiness
Psychologists have developed some exercises that can increase your happiness. But habits like these are hard to develop. Rituals can sometimes be easier to manage because they’re intentional. They can then develop into habits. Create a ritual of these exercises to improve your mood.

Jul 132017
 

by Linda-Ann Stewart

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One day, my father and a neighbor left for work at exactly the same time. They entered the freeway with the neighbor’s car directly behind my father’s. My father went with the flow of traffic, not changing lanes in a vain attempt to seek a faster route. The neighbor, however, wove in, out and through the traffic, trying to get ahead.

When my father finally left the freeway about 10 miles later, the neighbor was only one car ahead him. All that effort, stress, and extra gas had resulted in the gain of only two car lengths. Trying to maneuver to get ahead, she’d made very little progress, was frustrated in her attempts and irritated her nerves. She allowed her impatience to make a bad commute into a worse one.

Many times, when you try to compel a situation to move faster than it was designed to, you sabotage your efforts. It can even cause the circumstance to resist and push back. For instance, you can’t convince someone to love, accept or approve of you. The more you try to persuade them, the more you drive them away.

The same is true of not being able to force someone to hire you. You have to let them make the decision to do so. A salesperson that pressures a potential customer to buy their product will alienate that customer. When you try to shove your will onto a situation, you get the opposite of what you want.

By trying to control conditions, you’re tying up your inner resources. You’re stressed by your efforts and it interferes with your innovation, creativity, the ability to listen and to make plans. It also blocks your subconscious from seeking and finding other solutions.

When I was growing up, my mother used to repeat the proverb, “Don’t push the river, it flows by itself.” She explained that, no matter what you did, you couldn’t force the river to flow any faster. I realized she meant to not try to force events to unfold, because all you’ll is to waste energy. For example, have you ever tried to will yourself to fall asleep? The more you try, the more awake you become. You have to let go and allow it to happen.

But, at the same time, you also can’t just hope the river will take you where you want to go. You have to provide the right conditions to maximize your results. For example, to get to sleep more easily, you have to create a calm environment. There’s a fine line between going with the flow and swimming with the current.

If you just drift, the water could crash you onto rocks, or divert you into another tributary. However, if you swim with the current, you’re cooperating with the river and using its energy to propel you downstream. You’re also in better control of where you go. If it tries to tangle you in brush at the bank, you’re able to move away from the trees and back into the flow.

When it seems that no matter what you do, you get swept into eddies at the edge of the river or slammed onto rocks, assess your direction. Somehow, you’re not working with the current and the results are telegraphing that something is amiss. You need to address some aspect of your vision, mindset or plan.

Check your vision. Is it clear enough? Does it reflect what you really want? If it’s your business, do you have a product or service the public wants and needs? Have you communicated it in a way they realize its value? If you have a clear vision, then keep it in front of you every day.

Check your mindset. Do you believe your dream is attainable? Are you inspired to work towards your vision? Do you feel like you deserve what you’re seeking? If your mindset supports your vision, stay focused on where you want to go.

Check your plan. Do you have a step by step plan? Is it right for you? Is it taking you in the direction of your vision? Are you working it every day? If your plan is on track, make sure you’re taking consistent actions to keep you moving forward.

If you’re constantly frustrated with your progress, take a step back and consider. Are you trying to push the river to make it go faster? If so, you’re just wasting energy. Other elements may need to develop before you can get into the center of the channel. Be patient and persistent. When these three key items are aligned, you’ll be in the flow and swimming with the current.

Affirmation:
The Universe isn’t holding my good back from me. It wants me to have all the good I can accept. I now allow things to unfold in Divine Time for my Highest Good. I let go of trying to force events and let the Universe guide the situation. I take the actions I know to take, and align myself with the flow.

Watch this month’s Mindset Coaching Tip video, Stay the Course, which accompanies this article.

As a speaker, hypnotherapist, and vision coach, Linda-Ann Stewart helps business and professional women who feel stuck, immobilized and overwhelmed to create their vision, prioritize, and focus so they increase their productivity, prosperity and peace of mind. If you'd like some help to reach your goals, email her at LAS@Linda-AnnStewart.com with "Complimentary Consultation" in the subject line.
Jul 062017
 

Sunset Crater, Flagstaff AZWhat To Say To Yourself To Be Happier And More Successful
Do you have a negative voice in your head, telling you that you’re worthless, you can’t be a success, or undermining in some way? They influence your decisions and actions on a daily basis, limiting you and keeping you from fulfilling your potential. But when you can turn those negative thoughts around, they can be positive ideas to guide your life. This article gives 9 very positive self-talk scripts that you can use to flip those negative thoughts into positive ones.

Are You Wired for Resilience?
What would you do if you were assured of success? Most people are wired to avoid painful experiences, which limits them and makes their world smaller. Rather than allow the difficult situations hold you hostage, learn how to process them more quickly. Learn the skills in the article to improve your well being and bounce back from adversity.

3 Warning Signs You’re Dealing With An Aggressive Manipulator
Unfortunately, at some point, we all have to deal with manipulators. They may be coworkers, managers, or family members. They use passive-aggressive or intimidating patterns of behavior to get what they want. It can be indirect and sneaky or overt, as in a bully. This article delves into what makes them that way and the warning signs of one.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Jun 212017
 

By Linda-Ann Stewart

Marie went in to interview for a job she was fully qualified for. But she’d had several recent interviews, and hadn’t received an offer from any of them. As a result, she didn’t have the best attitude going into this situation. When she didn’t get the position, she said, “I knew it. I didn’t think I was going to get it.” Unfortunately, she got what she expected. Her belief became a self-fulfilling prophecy.

The attitude you have when you approach a challenge, or a change, greatly determines your outcome. Henry Ford said, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t – you’re right.” Your belief will affect your actions and the way you project yourself. If you don’t think you’ll be successful in a venture, you won’t give it 100% of your effort. You might think you do, but part of your energy will be held back to deal with potential disappointment.

Think about a recent goal you had. Did you believe that you could achieve it? What was your attitude towards it? You may have spent lots of time and action to move it in a positive direction. But if you didn’t believe that you would be successful, guess what? It would be unlikely that you could achieve your goal.

I’ve worked with hundreds of smokers in my practice and classes. If they repeat to themselves, “I can’t quit,” then it will be practically impossible for them to quit. When the smoker changes their attitude to “I can quit,” their subconscious works with them to make it possible. Until then, no matter what tools and techniques they use, they’ll be fighting against themselves and the directives they’ve been giving their inner mind. Your subconscious seeks to prove your belief is correct.

Your subconscious must act on what you tell it. If you want a new direction in your life, or to accomplish a goal, first you have to believe that it’s possible. Your subconscious will take its cue from where you focus your attention. Taking action without believing that you can be successful undermines your abilities and determination. You might make progress, but it’ll be a hard road with few rewards in comparison to the amount of labor you’ve put into it.

If you’re thinking, “This is never going to work,” then your subconscious will follow your direction. Not only that, if opportunities do come your way, you won’t be aware of them. Your subconscious will filter them out of your consciousness. It will be as if they don’t exist. Either you won’t recognize them or you’ll dismiss them. Your subconscious mind has to be congruent with your beliefs.

However, if you decide, “This has a good possibility of being successful, and I’ll do everything I can to accomplish it,” your subconscious will help you. For instance, when you’re choosing to change a habit, your inner mind will be in alignment with your goal and make it easier. If you’re working on a project, opportunities and information may drop into your lap.

What if you want to improve a corner of your life, but aren’t sure you will be able to believe you can accomplish it? Are you doomed to failure? Not necessarily. The more difficult you believe a goal will be to attain, the more commitment you have to bring to it as you work towards the goal. Your attitude needs to at least entertain the possibility that you can be successful.

Then you need to put more effort into the steps that will bring it to fruition. An abundance teacher says that the further away from Source you feel you are, the more action you have to take in the physical world.

Make sure your attitude isn’t one of “Just going through the motions,” because that will short-circuit your efforts. Take small steps, and praise yourself when you successfully complete each one. Your activity and dedication will impress your subconscious with the importance of your goal.

You may take two steps forward and one back, but you will start to make progress. And as you recognize the positive results of your efforts, and begin to believe that it is possible, your progress will accelerate.

Combining a positive attitude with being willing to do whatever is necessary to succeed is an unbeatable recipe for success. When you believe you can, your subconscious will help you to be right.

Affirmation:
If I can believe it, I can achieve it. The power of the Universe is at my command when I decide to commit to an intention. I realize that when I believe I can accomplish it, my subconscious seeks to prove me right. The Universe and my subconscious mind know how to bring about my intention, in a way that resonates with me. As I pair action with my belief that I can succeed, the Universe supports my every effort.

Watch the accompanying Monthly Mindset Coaching Video Build the Strength to Achieve Your Goals

Sparks of Insight

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Jun 162017
 

Sparks of Insight“The Universe loves and approves of me. As an individualized expression of the Universe, I love and approve of myself. I am worthy of all the good that Life can hold.”

Self-worth is important for a life of success and well-being. When you reject yourself, then you’re rejecting an expression of the Universe. No matter what you’ve done, the Universe accepts you. Your actions are separate from who you are. You are a unique individual, who deserves to be loved.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart