10 Simple Steps to a Happier You
Everyone wants to be happier. But unfortunately, many people pick the wrong road to happiness. They indulge in unhealthy pursuits that just create more loneliness and disharmony in their lives. But there are some easy ways to cultivate happiness in your life, and this article describes several of them.
You Can’t See the Forest for the Trees!
Sometimes you can’t see the real issues while you are in the midst of them. You lack perspective to view the whole picture and this can cause you to make decisions or take actions that aren’t constructive. Being able to recognize what can lead you into the forest can help to get you out of it.
Does Self-Compassion Make You Compassionate Toward Others?
Many people assume that self-compassion and compassion are related. After all, they both involve kindness—only the object of the kindness differs (ourselves versus another person). Despite what we might assume, research suggests that self-compassionate people aren’t always compassionate or vice versa. Both are beneficial, and it’s important to foster them both, because they have different purposes.
Using the Practice of Self-Kindness to Cope With Stress
Self-kindness is an important aspect of self-compassion. The author first defines what self-kindness is and what it looks like. Then she provides extensive and detailed exercises and strategies to help you develop self-kindness.
Do you have personality traits that you’re rejecting by trying to fit yourself into a mold that works for others, especially in your career? If so, you’re going to be wasting energy and not being as productive as you could be. Accepting yourself and working with your characteristics will make you much happier and more successful.
Do you have natural characteristics that involves your work life, that you’re fighting against?
I’m not talking about procrastination or perfectionism, which are learned traits. But what natural characteristics are you trying to repress them to fit into what everyone else expects from you? When you do, it’s a form of self-rejection. Not only does it erode your self-esteem, but it reduces your effectiveness.
For instance, years ago, I took a creative writing class that met at 9am every Thursday. I’m not at my peak at that time. I’m functional at best. A group of us from the class formed an organization to sponsor what became an international writing contest. I was secretary of the group and took notes at our meetings. One day, the president suggested we meet at 8am. I’m not a morning person. The person who sat next to me in class said, “Don’t do that to Linda-Ann. Haven’t you noticed that she doesn’t mentally join the class and start participating until 10am?” We all laughed, and because it was true, the president set the meeting at 10am.
How about you? Is there a personality trait you have that you’re fighting against? Are you trying to fit into someone else’s mold? I know that there are times it’s unavoidable. But if you are, you’re wasting your time and energy. They could be better used to accepting your idiosyncrasies and viewing them as your strengths. In other words, you know how to optimize your productivity.
For example, do you work best listening to music? How can you do that in a way that doesn’t affect others? Do you prefer to work in groups? What about teams? Maybe you can find a partner or partners to bounce ideas off of, so you can collaborate with them and have a sense of camaraderie.
When you’re able to honor your personality traits, you build a sense of self-trust and feel better about yourself. What are your idiosyncrasies? How can you accept and adjust them to fit into your work? When you’re able to do this, not only will you be more productive and successful, and be a whole lot happier.