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Practicing Goodwill to Yourself

Practicing Goodwill to Yourself

by Linda-Ann Stewart

Heart shaped Christmas wreath

This is the season for “Peace on Earth, goodwill to all.” But how is your goodwill towards yourself? In other words, how are you treating yourself? Are you doing things that nurture and nourish your inner being or are you putting yourself last on your list? The way you take care of yourself impacts your relations with everything in your world. When you don’t give your inner self importance, Life treats you much in the same way.

The Bible says to “Love thy neighbor as thyself.” This has been interpreted to mean that we’re to put others first. But read of the whole quote, “Love thy neighbor AS thyself,” not more than yourself. If you don’t love yourself, you can’t love your neighbor. Love of self and goodwill extends outward like the ripples in a pond. When you tend to yourself, you can tend to others because you have more love to spread.

There’s an old saying, “Charity begins at home.” This is because if you give all of yourself away, there’s nothing left for you, therefore there’s nothing left of you to give. If you don’t nurture yourself in a healthy way, your inner self will insist on it. For instance, if you work too hard, you might get sick to get some time off.

How can you nurture yourself? I’m not talking about eating a pound of fudge, but doing something that makes your inner being feel nourished. Getting enough sleep and eating healthy meals would be a good start. Other things to do could be to take a walk, get out into nature, meditate, do yoga, take a bubble bath, rent a video, or something else that makes you feel special. For you are special to the Universe. The Infinite wants you to show goodwill to yourself, so that your peace will spread to the world.

As a focus mentor, hypnotherapist, and writer, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity.To boost productivity and reduce overwhelm, register for her FREE guide, Design Your Best Day, at https://www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/guide.html You can contact her at LAS@Linda-AnnStewart.com or 928-600-0452.

Tip the Scales Towards the Positive

Tip the Scales Towards the Positive

When there’s a tragedy, you may resist feeling good because you think it’s inappropriate. But this is the most important time for you to focus on the good in your life. Doing so builds resiliency to handle difficult times. Learn a powerful technique that allows you to create more strength and empowerment for good times and bad. Watch Tip the Scales Towards the Positive.

Transcript:

Sometimes, when bad things have happened, such as a tragedy in the world or in your personal life, you might feel guilty for feeling upbeat. You might think it’s selfish, inappropriate or that you don’t deserve to.

This is common and natural, but doesn’t help you or anyone else. It just perpetuates the negativity, undermining your strength and reducing your ability to handle the situation. This is really the most important time for you to focus on what is good in your life.

When you pay attention to the good things in your life, you tip the scales toward feeling better. This results in more happiness and well being for you, more kindness and compassion towards others. You’ll have more resources to draw from to deal with the tragedy and when other upsetting experiences do occur.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart and I empower people to focus and align their heart with their vision so they can achieve their goals. I’d like to share with you how you can give yourself a well of resilience to draw from in good times and bad. This is a technique I use in my life and it’s served me well.

Neuroscience tells us that “neurons that fire together, wire together.” That means that the more you focus on the positive, the more neurons you build in the areas of encouragement, empowerment, and inspiration.

To stimulate your neurons to create more positive emotions, when you find  something pleasant in your life, let it fill you up. Instead of just thinking of it  for a few seconds, which, don’t get me wrong, is good, spend 20-30 seconds focusing on it.

Feel it, savor it. Let it pour through you like a warm glow, or golden liquid. I will often stop with the intention to take time to relish a scene or experience  to allow the joy and serenity of it to imprint on my memory.

The longer you dwell on the pleasant  experience and allow it to stimulate gratifying emotions, the stronger and more powerful the your positive neurons become.

I suggest practicing this several times a day. The more often you do this, the more you build a net of positive neurons that can support and nourish you in tough times.

Thank you for watching. If you enjoyed this video, please like my YouTube channel and click the bell to be notified of future videos about mindset, motivation and empowerment. Until next time, stay focused.

Read the accompanying article, Find the Good in Your Life.

Change Starts From Within

Change Starts From Within

by Linda-Ann Stewart

Woman happy she's changed

As a hypnotherapist, people come to see me professionally because they want some sort of change in their lives. Whether it’s to feel better about themselves, stop smoking, reduce weight, increase their self-confidence, improve their health, or have some other positive adjustment, they have made a choice that has brought them to my office. Together we figure out what they need to change within themselves, and what actions they need to take, to bring about the improvement in their lives.

Every so often, someone comes in who wants me to wave a magic wand over their head and make all their problems disappear, without them having to participate. They don’t want to have to alter a belief, attitude or behavior, but have the problem somehow erased. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way. For any change to occur, they have to make a corresponding internal and external commitment to that change.

Change from the Inside Out

For instance, a smoker who says they want to quit must truly decide which they want more, to smoke or not to smoke. Once they’ve chosen to stop smoking, they have to learn new ways to cope with life’s challenges, and dedicate themselves to this new lifestyle. Not only do they have to refrain from smoking, but they have to make the inner changes (and they are many) that are necessary to achieve the eventual goal of becoming a nonsmoker. If they try to quit, without these inner changes, then at the first sign of stress they’ll start up again.

All change starts from within. Initially, a person may just know that something has to improve, and may not even know how to go about it. In this case, they need to figure out what’s wrong and what they need to transform that will make it better. Many times, people want the outer world to be different without doing any inner work. But in every instance, progress begins with changing a thought, belief, attitude, and then a behavior before improvement can be seen in the physical world.

Improving Self-Esteem

For example, someone with low self-esteem, who feels like they’re not good enough, or not worth anything, may not realize that they need a greater sense of self-worth and not know what to do to reach it. All that they recognize is that they feel like they don’t deserve anything nice, and that people take advantage of them.

The first step in healing this is to stop putting themselves down and talk to themselves in a more compassionate and supportive manner. But they must also change some of their behaviors to mirror this new inner dialogue. No matter how difficult it is, they must make sure that they begin to stand up for themselves.

Deal with Inner Attitudes

This doesn’t mean that they should indulge themselves in unhealthy behaviors. For instance, I’ve known people who have decided that they deserve to go out and spend $100 on a meal, even if it means they can’t pay their rent, phone bill, or buy groceries. They think that’s the way to improve their self-image and feel better. Unfortunately, the opposite is true. A person with a healthy self-worth will deny themselves immediate, and transitory, gratification to be able to enjoy a sense of security in the long term.

The same is true for anyone who wants to reduce weight. Rewarding themselves with food, or using it to mask emotions, isn’t going to bring any lasting improvement. They must learn healthy eating behaviors, and listen to what their body (not their emotions) wants to eat, along with reducing portion size, and starting to exercise. They also have to learn to deal with their feelings without using food as a crutch. If the inner attitudes aren’t dealt with and adjusted, no diet in the world is going to permanently keep off the weight.

What Do You Need to Change?

Edwene Gaines, prosperity teacher, recommended meditating on this question, “What do I need to change within myself in order to…?” Sometimes it may mean being willing to let go of a relationship, move, or change jobs. It always indicates changing some attitude or belief on the inner plane, while making changes on the physical plane that show your commitment to the shift in your consciousness.

Permanent improvement in any area of life demands our making a choice for something different, begin to align our beliefs and attitudes so that the new idea is possible and desirable, and then take action to embody the new concept. All of these steps are necessary for there to be change. And when we begin to entertain the idea of change, the Universe will bring us opportunities to help it along. New people will show up in our lives, information will drop onto our desk, or some event may nudge it along. We just have to have the courage and commitment to take the leap into a brighter future.

Affirmation:

I now identify the areas of my life that I want to change and recognize what needs to happen for them to improve. I’m guided to understand what I need to change within myself to create the transformation in my life. The answer is clear. With my whole being, I’m willing to do what is necessary to improve. As I make the decision to change, the Universe supports me and brings whatever I need to help me.

Sparks of Insight

Sparks of Insight

Sparks of Insight

“For every thing you have missed, you have gained something else; and for every thing you gain, you lose something.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

Although you may want something better, you may have trouble giving up what you have right now. When you move from one location to another, even if the move is to a better life, you may grieve for what is left behind. That’s natural. But the only way to move forward is to let go of what you now have. It’s like crossing a small stream. The bank you’re on is safe and familiar. You can’t keep one foot on each bank, or you risk falling into the water. So you have to step across, completely leaving behind the other side.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Podcast Interview – Hypnotizing Your Mindset to Achieve Your Goals

Podcast Interview – Hypnotizing Your Mindset to Achieve Your Goals

Lois Sonstegard, Ph.D., ACC and I were introduced through a mutual acquaitance, and Lois invited me to be interviewed on her podcast, Building My Legacy. The podcast encourages, stimulates, challenges and motivates you as a leader to answer , “What’s next in my life?” She thought I had a unique perspective that her listeners would appreciate.

Because of my background as a hypnotherapist, we started out talking a bit about hypnosis.  As most people are, Lois was curious about the process. She was slightly surprised to hear that hypnosis is simply an intensely focused state of attention. We discussed how my hypnotherapy practice and what I learned from it has inspired my work as a coach for women small business owners.

We talked about our how, because we live in such a technologically driven world, and it’s easy to get distracted. Distraction from what’s important will undermine you personally and professionally.  Being distracted causes stress, and prevents you from thinking clearly or creatively. When you’re stressed, you react to the immediate problem without thinking the issues through. During our exchange, I described a simple technique you can use to calm your mind down and think more clearly.

Unfortunately, distraction can become a habit. The more you get distracted, the more you train yourself to be distracted. The good news is that if you can train yourself to be distracted, you can train yourself to be focused. I explained the process I use with my clients, to help them gain clarity, get focused and stay on course. Most people know what they don’t want, but have a hard time figuring out what they do want. At Lois’ request, I shared a technique I teach my clients to gain clarity. 

We had a delightful conversation. I love offering tips and explanations that empower people to have more satisfying and fulfilled lives. For more of Lois’ podcasts on becoming a better leader in your personal and professional life, listen to Building My Legacy on Spreaker or any of the major podcast channels.

Listen to Hypnotizing Your Mindset to Achieve Your Goals.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Sparks of Insight

Sparks of Insight

Sparks of Insight

Do you feel stuck in a rut and not know what to do to get out of it? Your feeling of stuckness and discontent is creating more of the same. And that feeling is to push you out of the comfort zone that’s gotten to be too small for you. So take some action, any action. Start walking, yoga or an exercise routine. Do some journaling about how you feel about it. Do whatever you can to get the energy moving again. Eventually, if not sooner, this will direct you back into the flow of harmony.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Are You Expecting Too Little?

Are You Expecting Too Little?

by Linda-Ann Stewart

Years ago, I was involved with someone who never kept his promises. Glenn was always late for a date and never called when he said he would. And, in this pre-cell phone era, I couldn’t call him. To reduce my frustration, I decided not to have any expectations of him. Also, I didn’t want to have my beliefs of how I thought he should act interfere in the relationship.

Unfortunately, since there were no consequences for his actions, it just encouraged his callous behavior. One day, when he was again a half-hour late, I’d had enough and I left. Later, we had a “discussion” about it and all of his other broken agreements with me. Faced with either treating me with more respect or having the relationship end, he said he’d live up to his promises.

The Problem with Low Expectations

The idea that prompted my original attitude was that when you have low expectations, then you’re delighted whenever something special comes your way. Trying to have the perfect relationship, best job, or ultimate success can keep you from enjoying the moment. You’re always living in the future, dissatisfied and unhappy in the present.

However, the attitude of,  “Don’t have any expectations. That way you’re not disappointed with what you get,”  means that you never strive to improve your life. You settle for what you have, happy with crumbs that life throws you, and don’t believe it can get any better. And with this attitude, your subconscious will only give you what it already has. It can’t give you anything more because you’re instructing it not to.

Why to Aspire for More

Aspiring for something better, and not reaching the apex, can bring disappointment. And disappointment hurts. After a failure, many people stop trying. They’re afraid to want more, and just try to be grateful for what they have. But then they don’t work hard towards anything, because why strive when they don’t believe they’ll achieve anything?

In that case, unfortunately, life responds according to our low expectations. By not expecting anything better, we don’t work for it. Being satisfied with the status quo, we don’t take any actions to stand up for ourselves. By not seeking to improve our job position, we will never put forth any effort to move up.  

But is giving up and being complacent the way to grow? Isn’t striving part of the learning process? Without moving toward a vision or a goal, then you’re not progressing. Very few people succeed the first, second or even fifth time. You learn something new with each attempt, and it makes you stronger and wiser.

Avoid Having Unrealistic Expectations

Although having unrealistic expectations can undermine the ability to achieve your goals and destroy your happiness, sensible ones can enrich your life. Working toward a realistic goal can build skills, character and get you closer to the life you want.

Wanting to lose 50 pounds in a month would be unrealistic. Deciding to reduce by 5 pounds a month is doable. It may take you awhile to reach your goal weight, but by the time you’ve lost the weight, you’ll have spent months living with your new eating behaviors. This would give you a better chance of maintaining your weight.

Hoping to become manager of your department a month after you first get the job would be unrealistic. However, meeting deadlines and giving more than asked would get you noticed. Before long, you could be asked to lead up a project that would put you on the promotion track.

Balance Your Expectations

When you have expectations, you’re able to gauge whether your goals are progressing properly or not. They allow you to measure whether you’ve met your objectives. If you haven’t, you adjust them and keep going.

As with everything, there are extremes to having expectations. Having too little can get you stuck in a dead end job, unhappy relationship, or stagnant life. If your expectations are too high or unrealistic, you’ll constantly be dissatisfied, unhappy and may eventually give up. However, when you have realistic expectations that require you to work towards them and grow, they’ll enrich your life.

What I wanted from a relationship was more than Glenn could give me. He continued to treat me as a convenience. Although it was difficult for me, I eventually ended the relationship with him. I wanted and expected better treatment and respect. Only by desiring something different, taking action towards it, and expecting that your actions will be successful, will you be able to experience something greater in your life.

Affirmation:

I give myself permission to accept greater abundance and success into my life. I keep my expectations realistic as I work towards my goals. Even if I don’t succeed the first time, I learn from the situation and try again. Only good comes to me as I pursue my dreams.

As a focus coach, hypnotherapist, and speaker, Linda-Ann Stewart motivates women entrepreneurs and small business owners to focus and transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, wellbeing and prosperity. To achieve your goals with confidence and ease in 4 powerful steps, register for her FREE training video and accompanying action planning guide at www.Linda-AnnStewart.com/setyourcourse.html. You can contact her at LAS@Linda-AnnStewart.com or 928-600-0452.

Sparks of Insight

Sparks of Insight

Sparks of Insight

“When I claim a greater good for myself, I realize I’m not taking that good from anyone else. Everyone has the same ability and connection as I do to receive a better life. Therefore, I release all inner restrictions and open my mind to receive all the best that Life can bestow.”

You deserve greater good. Period. That good is yours no matter what. It doesn’t belong to anyone else. No one else can use it. The only person it can serve is you, and you’re the only person who can deny it. Everyone has as much access to receiving their good as you do. So go ahead and accept what is already yours.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Podcast Interview – Service Without Sacrifice

Podcast Interview – Service Without Sacrifice

Camille Diaz and I were introduced by a mutual acquaintance, with the aim to see if I’d be a good fit for her podcast, Money Heart. Her podcast explores the emotional side of money. Camille is a business coach with The Optimized Zone, who offers courses and private coaching to help business owners streamline their business.

After we decided I’d be a good fit for her podcast, she broached the idea of my wearing a costume for it. I was prepared, as I’d already looked at some of the podcasts. I whipped out the tiara and necklace that I wear to to the Renaissance Faire each year, in costume. She laughed and said she loved to go to Renaissance Festivals in costume, too, and would wear her costume. To see photos of all the looks follow @moneyheartshow on Instagram.

In the podcast, I started out  with my personal story of how I got over involved in community affairs many years ago. My health suffered from stretching myself too thin, and I had to back out of them all to get healthy again. It was so hard to do that, especially when one person resisted. But it was the beginning of my journey to saying, “No,” and I learned valuable lessons from the experience.

We discussed what service actually means. And that when you choose to serve at the expense of your health and well being, there’s nothing left to give to anyone. Unfortunately, women have been trained to set aside their priorities. To serve, they think they have to sacrifice what’s precious to them. In our conversation, we explored why that wasn’t correct.

We agreed that with any service, there needs to be a balance of power and energy. Without that balance of giving and receiving, someone is going to feel uncomfortable. And if someone feels like they have to sacrifice themselves to serve, the issue is generally about something else, like self-esteem or old ideas. Camille asked how we can reprogram those thoughts, and I shared an exercise of how to identify and change the old ideas.

I had a great time talking with Camille. This is a subject we agree is an important one for women to reprocess. It’s time for us to realize that we can serve and have a reasonable exchange that’s beneficial to all concerned.

Watch Service Without Sacrifice.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Sparks of Insight

Sparks of Insight

Sparks of Insight

“The function of prayer is not to influence God, but rather to change the nature of the one who prays.” Soren Kierkegaard

The Universe holds all the good you could want in potential for you. When you pray, you’re not changing God’s mind. The Universe isn’t going to give that good to you or withhold it based on your prayer. The Universe couldn’t withhold your good any more than the sun could hold back its warmth. Prayer, affirmations, and anything else that is connecting to a Higher Power actually works to open your mind to a greater acceptance of that good.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart