Book Review-Healing the Shame that Binds You

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Oct 032017
 

Healing the Shame that Binds You (Recovery Classics)
by John Bradshaw

Many people grow up in dysfunctional families that have caused them to feel ashamed of natural needs, desires, and sometimes of just being. This results in their not feeling worthy, effective, or mattering. Healing The Shame That Binds You not only addresses the core issues behind the toxic shame that people feel, explains how it formed and where it comes from, it also gives valuable direction on how to heal it.

Most of us have been exposed to some sort of toxic shame, and carry it with us. This shame prevents us from living up to our potential, accepting ourselves, and accepting all the good Life has to offer us. The author examines these issues, to give the reader a deep understanding on how shame formed, different ways it manifests (such as panic attacks, addictions, and compulsions), and steps to take to resolve the problem.

This book isn’t just one of theory and information. It includes meditations, exercises, new behaviors to practice, and affirmations. Different methods of healing are explained and demonstrated. Anyone who grew up in a dysfunctional home, or who absorbed a sense of shame would benefit from reading this valuable source.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Stop Fighting Yourself

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Sep 202017
 

Do you have personality traits that you’re rejecting by trying to fit yourself into a mold that works for others, especially in your career? If so, you’re going to be wasting energy and not being as productive as you could be. Accepting yourself and working with your characteristics will make you much happier and more successful.




Transcript:
Do you have natural characteristics that involves your work life, that you’re fighting against?
I’m not talking about procrastination or perfectionism, which are learned traits. But what natural characteristics are you trying to repress them to fit into what everyone else expects from you? When you do, it’s a form of self-rejection. Not only does it erode your self-esteem, but it reduces your effectiveness.

For instance, years ago, I took a creative writing class that met at 9am every Thursday. I’m not at my peak at that time. I’m functional at best. A group of us from the class formed an organization to sponsor what became an international writing contest. I was secretary of the group and took notes at our meetings. One day, the president suggested we meet at 8am. I’m not a morning person. The person who sat next to me in class said, “Don’t do that to Linda-Ann. Haven’t you noticed that she doesn’t mentally join the class and start participating until 10am?” We all laughed, and because it was true, the president set the meeting at 10am.

How about you? Is there a personality trait you have that you’re fighting against? Are you trying to fit into someone else’s mold? I know that there are times it’s unavoidable. But if you are, you’re wasting your time and energy. They could be better used to accepting your idiosyncrasies and viewing them as your strengths. In other words, you know how to optimize your productivity.

For example, do you work best listening to music? How can you do that in a way that doesn’t affect others? Do you prefer to work in groups? What about teams? Maybe you can find a partner or partners to bounce ideas off of, so you can collaborate with them and have a sense of camaraderie.

When you’re able to honor your personality traits, you build a sense of self-trust and feel better about yourself. What are your idiosyncrasies? How can you accept and adjust them to fit into your work? When you’re able to do this, not only will you be more productive and successful, and be a whole lot happier.

Read the accompanying article Achieve Success through Self-Trust.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Sparks of Insight

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Sep 152017
 

Sparks of InsightWhere are you giving away your power? Where is your power going? Are you letting others manipulate you through guilt, anger? Are you letting some unhealthy substance control your actions, or not acting in healthy ways? Are you feeling helpless or hopeless? All of these are symptoms of your handing your power over to someone or something else. You have separated yourself from your Higher Self. You have a right to reclaim yourself and your power. Think about where you’ve given your power away and say, “I reclaim my power!”

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Trending Articles of the Week

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Sep 142017
 

Sun Rays3 Ways Gratitude leads to Positive Impact in Your Life
More and more research studies are finding that gratitude benefits your health, career and realationships. Although this article says it shows 3 ways it impacts your life, it actually addresses 9 ways. It also includes instructions on how to begin to bring these benefits into your life now.

You Can Change Your Mind
There is one thing that you have complete control over, and that’s what you think. Recognizing that you have this power, and that when you use it to shift to something more positive, impacts your life. When you change your mind, the world you experience changes, as well.

19 Ways to Conquer Low Self Esteem: 19 Influencers Chime in
Unfortunately, all too many people suffer with low self-esteem. The author sent a question to 19 people, and received powerful answers in response. If you experience low self-esteem, one of these answers may just help you to break through it.

Sparks of Insight

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Sep 082017
 

Sparks of Insight“I expect wonderful things to happen today. My attitude of expectancy opens doors for me. It releases the Power of the Universe that creates good.”

Expecting the best gives the subconscious direction to find and create the good that’s already available in potential from the Universe. Tuning into it is like turning the channel of your television. The channel you’re seeking is always broadcasting, you just need to find its signal.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Trending Articles of the Week

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Sep 082017
 

RainbowyClouds-yikrp55aT-smMake Someone Else’s Day, and 3 Other Ways to De-Stress
Unfortunately, we live in a highly stressed world and many are just trying to survive. Although it’s important to be effective at your job, it doesn’t have to impair your mental, emotional and physical well being. This article suggests 4 ways to reduce your stress and improve your happiness.

Signs Of Low Self-Esteem And The Root Causes You Might Not Know
People with low self-esteem tend to be over-critical of themselves. And many people have this problem and don’t know it. This article gives some symptoms, so you can assess if you suffer from it. Only by becoming aware of the issue can you start to remedy it.

5 Ways To Stop Doubting Yourself
Self-doubt destroys reaching for your dream. It holds you back and can undermine you in ways you’re not aware of. You make excuses or avoid challenges. The opposite of self-doubt is self-confidence. This articles gives ways to eliminate self-doubt and regain your confidence so you can attain your dreams.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Achieve Success through Self-Trust

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Sep 072017
 

by Linda-Ann Stewart

Emerson-Self-trustQuote“Self-trust is the first secret of success.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

Do you know what you want? Many people don’t know what they want because they don’t trust themselves to achieve it. They’d rather not want anything than be disappointed. They distrust the validity of their own desires and doubt their judgment because of past failures.

Before you take steps towards accomplishing a dream, you have to believe in yourself and your abilities. You need to know that you can access the knowledge, develop the habits, and find the opportunities to create your goal.

What exactly is self-trust? It’s a belief in yourself, trusting that you’ll be there for yourself, that you can handle what life throws at you. It means that you’re accountable and responsible for yourself. When you’re able to depend on yourself, you have confidence that you’ll be on your side. Self-trust ensures that you’re interested in and supportive of your wellbeing.

Being able to trust yourself is the first ingredient you need to be successful in all areas of your life. Not trusting yourself means you don’t believe you’ll finish what you intend to do. Distrusting yourself undermines your relationship with yourself and everyone else, including the Universe.

In business, it’s said that “People do business with those they know, like and trust.” The same is true of your personal life. You’re attracted to those you like and trust and vice versa. Are you trustworthy enough for you to be friends or do business with? If not, how can you reach that place of inner assurance?

Self-trust doesn’t just happen. It has to be built, the same as in any relationship. When you first meet someone, you rarely trust them immediately. Over time and through experience, they have to show that they’re truthful and reliable. You develop a relationship with yourself the same way. Here are four ways in which you can start to cultivate a sense of self-trust.

1. Honor your values. Your values are principles you choose to live by. They’re standards of behavior or ideals that you uphold, like integrity, service, or family. There will be times when it’s hard to stay true to them. But if you don’t, you’ll feel inauthentic and like you’ve abandoned yourself. And you’ll sense a separation from the Universe. When you live according to your values, it builds your self-worth and self-esteem.

2. Honor yourself. Pay attention to your health and wellbeing. When you need to take care of yourself, refuse extra demands on your time. You’re as important as anyone else, and if you don’t treat yourself well, no one else will do so either. If someone asks you to do something you don’t want to do or can’t fulfill, be kind to them (and yourself) and say no. As you support your worth, you’ll develop a positive self-regard.

3. Honor your agreements and commitments. If you do consent to perform some action, follow through and fulfill it. Not doing so breaks a promise to yourself and others. And those who break promises can’t be trusted. The same is true when you agree to a condition, like not to track mud onto the carpet. Keeping appointments you make also falls under this heading. Be on time or as close to it as possible. By doing so, you’re fostering self-respect and earning the respect of others.

4. Honor your decisions. After you make a decision, stick to it, unless you get new information that affects your choice. Stop seeking others’ approval for your choices. Take responsibility for your decisions and for their consequences. Some people won’t like that you’re being autonomous, but that’s their problem. It’s your life and you make the choices based on your experiences and what’s important to you. Rely on your own authority.

Trust grows more trust, in yourself and others. When you believe in yourself, it allows for innovation, creativity, and the flexibility to change directions when needed. The more you trust yourself, the more you trust the Universe and the Law of Attraction. You’re able to let go of fear and doubt, and have faith that you live in a beneficial universe.

Affirmation:
The Universe perceives me as a worthwhile human being. It has given me everything I need to succeed, personally and professionally. It’s my responsibility to exercise the qualities It has bestowed upon me. As I advocate for myself, I feel more whole and authentic.

Watch the accompanying video Stop Fighting Yourself.

As a vision strategist, hypnotherapist, and speaker, Linda-Ann Stewart helps women entrepreneurs and small business owners who feel stuck, immobilized and overwhelmed to to get clear, focused and on the fast track to the next level of their business. If you'd like some help to reach your goals, email her at LAS@Linda-AnnStewart.com with "Complimentary Consultation" in the subject line.

Sparks of Insight

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Sep 012017
 

Sparks of InsightTry changing the pronoun of your affirmation from “I” to “You” or “Your Name.” You respond differently when someone else encourages you. You feel believed in, validated, appreciated. In doing so, you actually become your own coach. The third person, “Your Name,” helps by being from some neutral party. It’s more objective and detached, therefore connects with the mind on a different level.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Trending Articles of the Week

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Sep 012017
 

Flagstaff Aspen Rainbow6 Money Habits That Could Cripple Your Business Over Time
Unfortunately, 50% of businesses fail within the first five years. And one of the issues that failure can be due to is faulty money management. This isn’t true just for businesses, but for personal finances, as well. But you can change those poor money habits and improve the course of your success.

Get Rid of These 3 Thoughts We All Have That Stunt Our Growth of Resilience
We’ve all experienced adversity, grief and trauma in our lives. Sometimes we’re able to overcome it, and other times, we stumble and get stuck. Learn some steps on how to recover and start making progress again.

10 Powerful Ways to Stand Up for Yourself in Any Situation
Sometimes, when there’s an unpleasant situation, we take the path of nonresistance. We try to avoid conflict by going along to get along. But that rarely gives us beneficial results. Instead, it encourages the offender to continue and makes us feel helpless. When you stand up for yourself, you feel and become stronger. Here are some great steps to take charge of your life.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Sparks of Insight

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Aug 252017
 

Sparks of Insight“Acceptance of what has happened is the first step to overcoming the consequences of any misfortune.” – William James

Resisting, denying or ignoring a reality just gives it more energy. Before anything can change, you have to know what needs to change. Accepting that it is so doesn’t mean that you’re giving in to it. All you’re doing is stating, “This is where I am now, and now I can change it.” The energy you were using to repress the situation can now be used to recreate the outcome.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart