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A Tip on How to Endure a Rough Day

A Tip on How to Endure a Rough Day

Everyone’s had a rough day, at some point. The challenge is to find a way to get through it with your equilibrium intact. Many years ago, I had one that had me drawing on my inner resources and perspective to make it to the end of the day. Learn the mindset shift I used that can help you  to prevail over a tough day.

Transcript:

Have you ever had a rough day? I mean, who hasn’t? It could be a day that starts with you being late, and goes from bad to worse. Or having communication snafus. But it’s a day that you can’t wait to end.

Many years ago, when I was in my early twenties, I had a tough day at work that seemed to last forever.  I’d like to share the mind shift tactic that got me through it.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus coach and hypnotherapist. I motivate people to transform their business through deliberate actions that break through distraction and overwhelm to greater success, freedom, and wellbeing. And much of it depends on mindset, which is what I had to use on the rough day I had.

I’d just started working at a picture framing shop that was part of a chain. Customers would come in and pick out the mats and frames they wanted. But instead of leaving the artwork with us to do the work, we cut everything and showed them how to put it all together. That was a challenge all by itself.

The nightmare for me began one Saturday morning. It was pouring, and for some reason, we had more customers come in that morning than we’d had combined in the two weeks prior. The front part of the store, where we helped customers choose their materials, was packed with people.

The work overwhelmed the two of us who were working, so we called in a couple of reinforcements. One of them was the former manager of that shop. She put me to cutting mats, which wasn’t a great idea, as I was still getting used to the equipment.

When my mats didn’t pass her high expectations, she reamed me out in front of the entire store. It wasn’t just a mild rebuke or reprimand, but a full-on raging at me. It felt like it went on forever, but it was probably just a couple of minutes.

You know the cartoon with one person yelling, and the other person is blown back on their heels and their hair streams out behind them? That’s how I felt. Instead of walking out, I kept telling myself, “This too shall pass.”

She gave me the job helping customers choose their mats and frames. I got a lot of sympathetic looks from the people I helped, but it made me more humiliated. I kept telling myself, “This day will end. I’ll eventually be home, eating dinner and watching TV.” The phrase became a mantra for me to keep me going, as people kept coming in and filling the store.

Of course, finally, the day did end. Once the manager left for the day, my original coworker commiserated with me, telling me that the manager had often raged like that. Fortunately, that was the only time I ever encountered that manager.

A couple of months after this episode, the shop was sold and my services no longer required. That was fine with me. It had been a difficult job, with long hours and low pay, and that incident hadn’t improved it.

When you’re having a rough day, remember that it’s temporary. It will pass, and things will get better. Find some concept, an affirmation, or mantra that supports you and helps you to maintain your equilibrium as you slog through the mess.

Visualize it being over, as I did. I even celebrated when another hour would pass. “One more down, only X number left.” You can even break it down into getting through one minute at a time.

Eventually, the day will simply be a memory that will lose its importance. I do still remember that experience many decades later, but mainly for how I got through it.

For more tips and articles on mindset, motivation and empowerment, visit my blog http://www.EmpoweringYourMind.com Thank you for watching. Stay focused.

Read the accompanying article, The Power of Perspective.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Podcast Interview – Mindset, Vision, Focus

Podcast Interview – Mindset, Vision, Focus

Janice Porter and I met in a networking group and shortly thereafter had a Zoom call to get to know each other better. She’s a Relationship Marketing Specialist and an amazing LinkedIn trainer, who gave me some tips on my LinkedIn profile, which I followed. She’s all about relationship building, online and offline, to grow your business and turn your connections into clients and referral partners. Relationships are so important to her that she has a podcast called Relationships Rule.

We hit it off in our call and, as a result, she asked me to be a guest on her podcast, to talk about focus and how it’s so easy to get scattered. It was a delightful conversation, wandering from how she struggles with being scattered to tips on how to stay focused to mindset to how success begins within. We even discussed whether I believe curiosity is innate or not.

We both are very curious people and it can take us both down rabbit holes. I can spend hours exploring an idea. She has a similar challenge. These tangents don’t help us when we’re trying to accomplish something. I gave her a suggestion, which I use, which can make sure our curiosity doesn’t undermine our goals.

We had a meandering conversation, but kept coming back to focus. We explored tactics to keep yourself focused. She also brought up that she didn’t really like to establish vision and goals. I explained why they’re beneficial and how you can create them in a way that will work with the subconscious mind.

As we discussed mindset, we explored how it’s more than positive thinking. It’s much more global than just optimism. We both weren’t so positive when we were younger and now choose to be positive. It is a choice about how to perceive a situation.

I mentioned how television news engages our emotions, which means it sends us into a light state of hypnosis. This can mean you accept what’s being said without analyzing it. I suggested to read news items, as you can be more objective.

We touched on the subject of believing in yourself. If you don’t believe in yourself, it’s a good bet you’ll sabotage your goals and dreams. She asked what I noticed when someone started to believe in themselves. They immediately change their actions, and start getting better results.

At her request, I gave my last piece of advice.  Focus is a skill you can develop. You can learn how to practice focusing and how to do train yourself to do so. We knew we could have continued our conversation, but unfortunately, our time was limited and we had to end it there.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Where Do You Draw the Line?

Where Do You Draw the Line?

Sometimes, it’s hard to know when you’re being taken advantage of. Maybe you tolerate inappropriate behavior, risk your own well being, and don’t even realize it. How can you recognize when this happens? There are some important cues that can tell you that someone has gone over your line. Once you begin to identify the signals, you can then decide how to handle the situation.

Transcript:

On social media a while back, someone I’ve known for quite some time  took advantage of our connection and regularly needled me. I pretty much ignored it, taking the advice of, “Don’t feed the trolls.” Usually, if someone who trolls you doesn’t get a reaction, they lose interest and leave you alone. They go trolling for people who are more responsive. But when this person escalated the attacks on me, I blocked them.

When the comments were benign, they were a nuisance, but didn’t bother me. This person was just looking for attention. But I drew the line when the comments got malicious. For me, that went way beyond what I would tolerate. The intent was disturbing.

Are there any areas where you’re tolerating inappropriate behavior? I don’t mean just on social media. Maybe, to keep the peace, you’re making concessions that make you uncomfortable or even resentful. For instance, you help someone out, but they expect much more. And you give in because you feel guilty. Or, in business, you cater to a customer who demands more of your time or resources than they’re entitled to. You capitulate because you’re afraid you’ll lose them as a customer.

How do you know when to draw the line? Pay attention to how you’re feeling about the interaction. When you feel agitated, confused, offended, upset, or like I did, disturbed, those are generally signals that someone has crossed a line. That’s when you need to decide what to do to support your well being and peace of mind. You have a right and a responsibility to yourself to take action. It could be just saying, “No,” or “Enough,” and following through on that intention. Or you may have to go further, like I did.

Should I have drawn the line earlier, before the comments escalated? For instance, should I have told them to stop needling me and be civil if they wanted to continue to converse with me? Possibly. But, they already knew what would happen if they went too far. And, knowing this person, I suspect a further warning wouldn’t have worked and the result would have eventually been the same. If a person deliberately chooses to be unpleasant, then there’s no reason for me to give them further  attention.

Draw your lines, set your limits, and by doing do, you show that you respect yourself and your values.

To achieve your goals with confidence and ease in 4 powerful steps, watch my FREE training video, Set Your Course to Success. Register for the video and accompanying action planning guide at www.SetYourCourseGuide.com

Stay focused.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Why Is Focus Important for Success?

Why Is Focus Important for Success?

Ingafay Faison Cavitt and I met at a virtual networking event. She introduced herself as a Confidence Coach for Women. Since that was one of my specialties in my hypnotherapy practice, we scheduled a video call to get to know one another better. She works with women in direct sales to become the person they were destined to be. At the end of our conversation, she decided that my approach as a focus coach would work well on her podcast.

Being able to focus is vital to being successful in business, so that’s the approach we decided to take. I shared my story of  how, when I focused on one item at a time on a long to-do list, I was finally able to complete items in a short period. Ingafay agreed that doing one thing at a time is more productive.

We discussed how getting distracted can feel rewarding, but you don’t get much done. And it can cause you to seek out more distractions. Oddly enough, one hour of focused time is equivalent to many more hours of distracted time.

I shared 4 steps that anyone can use to develop the skill of focus. One of those steps was to take breaks after a period of concentration to give the mind time to recover. Ingafay asked if a break could be like doing household chores and I said, “Yes.”

At the end of the podcast, she asked me about something I’d mentioned  when we’d had our first conversation. She asked, “Can you talk again about introverts and extroverts?” I explained that introverts and extroverts need different types of stimulation to focus for productivity. Extroverts work best around other people and introverts work best alone. I shared how a friend had tried me to work her way, and I couldn’t. I really enjoyed talking with Ingafay and wished we had more time. We both have the mission to lift women up, support and empower them to have better lives. Women have the power to fulfill their dreams.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Podcast Interview – Thrive Through Greater Self-Worth

Podcast Interview – Thrive Through Greater Self-Worth

Emmalou Penrod M.A., of Healing Your Families, and I were introduced by a mutual acquaintance. In our initial conversation, we realized we had something in common. We both had been trained to use hypnosis to improve people’s lives! She’s a retired schoolteacher, and now coaches families to have more peaceful homes. She’s a parenting and family strengthening expert, and brings her knowledge of counseling to help heal families.

As we talked, we had such a connection that she invited me to be interviewed on her podcast at WinWinWomen.tv. Although family issues aren’t my professional area of expertise, one topic that affects everyone is self-worth. My specialties as a hypnotherapist were stress management, success programming and self-esteem/self-worth issues. Since Emmalou and I agreed that having better self-worth made better parents, we decided that would be a great topic to cover.

In the interview, we began by talking about how I became a focus coach for women small business owners. I explained that women tend to be scattered because of all their responsibilities. It’s difficult for them to focus for any length of time on any one thing. But focus is necessary to accomplish anything.

Then Emmalou asked about the opposite of focus, “What do you think of multitasking?”

“Multitasking” is a myth,” I answered, and explained why. She said she’d heard it described as “a lie,” which is also true. Multitasking keeps your brain fractured between all the different tasks. It breaks your train of thought, so you can’t build up momentum on any project or task.

This led into discussing the difference between self-esteem and self-worth. Self-esteem can be impacted by outside variables and self-worth is more internal and fundamental. And both are impacted by having a strong inner critic. Emmalou liked my perspective on the inner critic not being a bad guy, but fulfilling a role that a person has outgrown.

Emmalou asked how a person could improve their self-worth. I answered that being kinder to oneself and being mindful helped to support and build self-worth. At the end of the conversation, I shared three simple steps on how to be kinder to yourself.

Because of Emmalou’s background, expertise and knowledge, I loved talking with her about this subject. I could have gone on for hours, but we had to fit into the podcast’s time frame. But I have articles on this topic here and on my website to help you reclaim your worth. And Emmalou has articles on her blog to help you become a better person, and thus, a better parent.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

How Are You Programming Your Inner GPS?

How Are You Programming Your Inner GPS?

You have an inner GPS that guides you to your goal or vision, just as an external GPS will tell you the route to take to a destination. You program your inner GPS either deliberately or inadvertently, and it will keep you on course or take you off it. But you can correct its course by staying aware of your direction. Learn the 3 things to stay aware of as you progress towards your vision, and how they program your inner GPS.

Transcript:

I’m sure you know what a GPS or Global Positioning System is, right? It’s a device that you use, usually in a car, to direct you to your destination. You decide where you want to end up, program that into the GPS, and it calculates the best route to get you there. Then, step by step, the GPS tells you the route to take.

You also have an inner GPS that you program to guide you to a goal you select. Your inner GPS operates on the vision of what you want, and then your GPS figures out how to get you there. Very similar process to the GPS you use in your vehicle.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a focus coach. I’d like to share the 3 things, after your vision that you use to program your inner GPS.

What if you’re not keeping your attention on your vision? Maybe you’re afraid you won’t be able to achieve it, or you get distracted by something else along the way. Your GPS operates on where you aim your attention.

There’s a saying, “Energy flows where attention goes.” If your attention strays from your vision, you have effectively reprogrammed your inner GPS to wherever you’re redirecting your focus. It may or may not be where you’ve consciously chosen to go.

You can determine whether or not you’re on course to your vision. You’ll have landmarks, or goals, along the way that you know you should be passing or achieving. If you find you’re off course, check if you’ve unknowingly changed your GPS’s programming.

1. Where has your attention been? Has it been on your desired destination or on something else? Have you not been keeping your attention on where you want to go, or have you been distracted?

2. What’s your attitude about your vision? Do you want it badly enough to work towards it? Or are you afraid of the changes it would bring? 

3. What actions have you been taking? Are they ones that propel you towards your vision or to some other destination?

Constantly monitor your attention, attitudes and actions, which all combine to program your inner GPS with your vision. When you assess them and they’re all aligned, then your inner GPS will keep you on course to your destination.

To achieve your goals with confidence and ease in 4 powerful steps, watch my FREE training video, Set Your Course to Success. Register for the video and accompanying action planning guide at www.SetYourCourseGuide.com

Thank you for watching. Stay focused.

Read the accompanying article, Update Your Internal GPS to Reach Your Vision.

Podcast Interview – Improve Your Focus

Podcast Interview – Improve Your Focus

I had a lovely conversation with Marybeth Welty of Sustainable Lifestyle Solutions on how to Improve Your Focus and Overcome Shiny Object Syndrome. As an interior designer, she helps create calm and inspiring home and office spaces. In addition to her design work, she also teaches mindfulness and leads guided meditations, both of which are dear to my heart. Her mission is to encourage healthy minds and healthy homes.

In my work with clients, I empower women to be present and aware of their choices and decisions, which comes from being mindful. As we talked about what I do, we discussed how her mindfulness training and my work intersect. It’s so important to think things through and discover new solutions from a point of peace.

In our conversation, we covered what can cause the Shiny Object Syndrome and the problems that result from it. For one thing, it creates stress, which means you can’t think clearly. In a way, multitasking is a part of the syndrome. We agreed that any benefits from multitasking are a myth. Not only do you not finish anything, but you end the day feeling exhausted. Getting distracted by Shiny Objects is a symptom that something is amiss in your business.

We talked about how focus is a skill that you can develop. Mindfulness helps to cultivate focus. And as we discussed the Shiny Object Syndrome, Marybeth was surprised that allowing yourself to get distracted means you’re training your brain to seek more distractions. Distractions and paying attention to something new lights up the reward circuit in your brain. Since it feels good, you pursue more distractions. But it ultimately sabotages you, since nothing gets accomplished.

We exchanged stories about our own difficulties with staying focused. At the end, I shared 5 steps to overcome the Shiny Object Syndrome, with first being to take some deep breaths to calm down your nervous system so you can think clearly. Once you’ve done that, only then you can seek some clarity and get focused.

Marybeth is a calming and tranquil presence. I really enjoyed spending time with her and be able to chat about subjects that are near and dear to both of us.

Guided Imagery to Break Through to Your Goal

Guided Imagery to Break Through to Your Goal

Are you holding yourself back from moving forward with a goal, or making an improvement in your life? Before you can make any changes, you need to be aware that there’s a problem. Then the solution can be identified and acted upon. This short guided meditation will lead you through a 4 steps process to break through the barrier and help you achieve your goal.

Transcript:

Are you holding yourself back from moving forward with a goal, or making an improvement in your life? If so, being aware that you are is the crucial first step to changing that. I’d like to share a very short guided meditation to help you to break through that barrier and allow you to make progress on your goal or vision. 

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a vision empowerment strategist helping women business owners focus, as well as a hypnotherapist with over 30 years experience. This meditation will lead you through some imagery to help you assess how you’re holding yourself back and examine why. Then, the imagery will encourage you to consider how your lifestyle would be with your goal, and imagine your next steps.

If you choose, close your eyes:

You have a goal or an improvement you want to make in your life. Envision it clearly… Your goal is important to you. But you’re aware that, for some reason, you’ve been holding yourself back from taking action. How are you doing that? What are you doing, or not doing, that’s preventing you from moving forward? Examine this without judgement or emotion…

Once you’ve examined what you’re doing, or not doing, dig a bit deeper. Why are you doing, or not doing, that? Why are you holding yourself back? It may be some idea that served you in the past, but isn’t any longer.

Right now, simply intend to explore the reason. That reason might surface now, or surface later today, or in the near future. Once you’ve identified the reason, you can decide whether or not you want to change that belief so it serves you in the present.

Now, consider how your life would be, having achieved your goal or vision. What would be different in your life and lifestyle? How would your beliefs be different? What habits would you have developed that you don’t have now? How would you feel, and feel about yourself, having achieved your goal? Allow this feeling to grow and expand within you. 

With that feeling motivating you, what decisions do you need to make now, so you can move forward? What step do you need to take in the next few days to make progress? Can you commit to taking that step? Imagine yourself taking the next step, and the next, all the way to your goal.

Open your eyes. In this meditation, once you’ve resolved what’s been holding you back, you imagine you’ve accomplished your goal. As you use this imagery, you give your subconscious mind a map to follow. With this map, your subconscious mind finds it easier to solve problems that come up along the way. Step by step, you can move closer and closer, until your goal is a reality in your life.

To achieve your goals with confidence and ease in 4 powerful steps, watch my free training video, Set Your Course to Success. Register for the video and accompanying action planning guide at www.SetYourCourseGuide.com

Thank you for watching. Stay focused.

Read the accompanying article, Simple Steps to Positive Change.

Podcast Interview – StoryVan.tv

Podcast Interview – StoryVan.tv

I recently had the pleasure of talking with Bonnie McDonald Dixon on her StoryVan.tv show. She and her husband, Greg, live in their RV and travel around Canada and the U.S., and get to know all sorts of people. She and Greg interview some of those people on their video podcast.

She and I met through a networking meeting, and hit it off. Years ago, I traveled from Arizona to Texas in an RV a couple of times, and once from Arizona to the East Coast and up to Maine. I enjoyed RVing, and could resonate with Bonnie and Greg’s fascination with it.

Bonnie is a health advocate with decades of experience in the natural health business. She’s warm, humorous, and has a passion to help people. One of the ways she does this is a website for those who live on the road or overseas. She and Greg  have a website with tips and ideas for people who want to live the nomad lifestyle like they do. Their HealthyWealthyCamper.com website includes health and income creation ideas for those who travel.

In our discussion on the show, Bonnie was interested in my hypnotherapy background and how it informed my coaching women who suffer from the shiny object syndrome. We all suffer a bit from the shiny object syndrome. Getting distracted while you’re going through life is natural. The problem comes when you get stuck in that cycle.

On the show, she and I talked about some of the causes of the shiny object syndrome, reasons why it can occur, as well as some of the consequences of it. Stress is one of the problems it creates, and stress shuts down creative thinking. During our conversation, I mentioned a couple of secrets about the subconscious mind and stress that can help people to know.

Bonnie was curious if the shiny object syndrome might impact your self-esteem. I responded that your self-esteem and self-respect can take a dive if you succumb to the shiny object syndrome because you’re not keeping promises to yourself.

I enjoyed our talk and was disappointed when the show ended. Even then, we chatted a bit. She’s truly an amazing person and one I am honored to have met and spent some time with.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

3 Tips to Overcome Procrastination

3 Tips to Overcome Procrastination

Procrastination is an insidious habit that can undermine your goals, erode your self-confidence and self-respect. But procrastination can be overcome, especially if you take it a bit at a time. Here are 3 tips on how to confront this habit and break through so procrastination no longer holds you back.

Transcript:

Everyone procrastinates from time to time, right? You have a distasteful task or chore you don’t want to do or don’t know exactly how to tackle, so you put it off. Now, if you just postpone taking action for a short time, and then you take care of the task, you don’t have a problem.

But if procrastination has developed into a habit, it can severely impact your life. This habit can undermine any goal you might have, and wear away your self-confidence and self-respect.

I’m Linda-Ann Stewart, a vision empowerment strategist, and I’d like to share 3 tips on how to confront procrastination and overcome it.

Go through your mail immediately. Don’t let it pile up. This sounds silly and simplistic, but by starting small, with mail, it will build up your discipline to handle bigger tasks.

I used to have a pile of mail on my table that I hadn’t made decisions on. Finally, after I’d whittled down the pile, I trained myself to decide what to do with each piece of mail as it came in. I decided to either file the piece, handle it, or throw it away.

When you practice this and it has become natural, move on to larger issues, such as balancing your checkbook.

There’s an app for that. Of course, there are apps to help you deal with procrastination. Some help you take action on your to do lists, or block distractions, help you stay focused while you’re working, make you aware of your excuses, or whatever you need. Do an internet search and start exploring to find an app that will work for you.

Find an accountability partner. Yes, you could use an app, but there’s nothing like a real live person to keep you committed to a course of action. This could be a friend, coworker or colleague who you tell what you plan to accomplish and by when. You check in with this person regularly, bringing them up to date on your progress.

I belong to a mastermind group. When I tell them my intention, and our next meeting is approaching, I make sure I’ve accomplished something.

If you’re having trouble with procrastination, there are many ways to begin to break this pervasive habit. You don’t have to do it all at once. Start with one small action, keep it up until you get comfortable with that action, and then add another tactic. This way, you’ll chip away at the habit until it no longer holds you back.

To achieve your goals with confidence and ease in 4 powerful steps, watch my FREE training video, Set Your Course to Success. Register for the video and accompanying action planning guide at www.SetYourCourseGuide.com

Thank you for watching. You can break the habit of procrastination. Stay focused.

Read the accompanying article, Read the accompanying article, 4 Ways to Overcome Procrastination.