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Will I be optimistic in 3 weeks?

Will I be optimistic in 3 weeks?

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Question about affirmations

Question: If I say an affirmation for three weeks, will I see results and think only positive thoughts by then?

Answer: If you begin saying a positive affirmation, and say it consistently every day for three weeks, you’ll notice an improvement in your attitude. However, you’ll need to catch each negative thought and idea and change it to a positive for the results to be most effective.

And you won’t have a permanent change in your thoughts after just three weeks. You’ll need to keep up with the affirmation, and transforming your negative thoughts even after that. But the negative thoughts will be fewer and you’ll be more positive overall.

This isn’t something you can do for a few days, weeks or months and then stop doing. It’s a focused change of thinking that must continue. You won’t have to be as diligent later on, because you’ll be more aware of your negative thoughts and automatically change them to positives. Affirmations aren’t magic. You have to use them consistently for them to work.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Difference between subconscious and unconscious

Difference between subconscious and unconscious

Question about affirmations

Question: Would you please define the differences between the subconscious and unconscious minds?

Answer: The difference between the terms “subconscious” and “unconscious” is simply a difference of terminology. It’s essentially the same name for a part of our consciousness. It’s been called the unconscious, subconscious and subjective mind, but a rose is still a rose, whatever you call it.

I just prefer the term subconscious (or even subjective), because that part of the mind is beneath or subject to the conscious, rational mind. In other words, it takes direction from the conscious and must do so.

Even though the conscious mind is only about 10% of our consciousness, it is the authority or driver. Think of an iceberg, 10% is above the surface, and 90% is below the surface.

I don’t like the term “unconscious” referring to our consciousness, because it insinuates that that part of our consciousness isn’t aware. It’s always aware and processing information.

The only time I usually use “unconscious,” is when I’m referring to an action, because our subconscious often prompts us to act out without awareness of our actions. That’s where habits come from. We unconsciously follow our programming, whether it’s a physical, mental or emotional habit.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Special or Safe Place Imagery

Special or Safe Place Imagery

Sparks of Insight

Question: Does the “special, safe or happy place” in self-hypnosis or guided imagery have to be from a childhood place?

Answer: The peaceful, special, safe or happy place doesn’t have to be from childhood. When I’m leading a client into it, I tell them to imagine a vacation spot or someplace completely imaginary, where no one can bother them and they feel completely safe. It could be on a cloud, above the cares of the world, or on a deserted beach.

Only a few people have had a hard time with that, and usually it’s because they can’t remember ever feeling safe. In that case, I recommend that they think of a time when they felt a little safe, maybe with a trusted friend. I then tell them to continue practicing with it, because each time they’ll get a little closer to the feeling of safety.

Not only is a feeling of safety important for stress reduction, but also for any improvements in your life. If you don’t feel safe, the subconscious won’t to create anything new. It will still be in “survival mode” and consider that any change is threatening to your current tenuous sense of security.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Empathy Overlooks Behavioral Consequences?

Empathy Overlooks Behavioral Consequences?

Question about affirmations

Question: How can empathy make people overlook the consequences of the actions of another person?

Answer: When we’re empathetic, we feel another’s pain. Because it hurts us, we want to fix it (their pain) and make it go away so it stops hurting us. Many times, this means that we excuse an offender, let them get away with inappropriate behavior, so that they feel better/feel better about themselves (so we think), and our pain eases. The problem with that is that they don’t learn from their mistake. We take away the motivation for them to learn from it, by excusing them. In so doing, we make ourselves part of the problem.

It’s not easy to let someone take the consequences of their actions, when we’re sensing their inner pain. But the only way many people learn is to be in enough pain to finally decide to change. In 12-Step programs, this is called “hitting bottom.” Sometimes, an intervention can help to make the alcohol/drug abuser uncomfortable enough to accept help. But during an intervention, the consequences of not accepting help have to be severe enough, and decided enough, to make them realize that they’re not going to be allowed to continue taking advantage of others.

When do we nurture and when do we let them fall flat on their face? If it’s a pattern of behavior, I think it would be time to allow them to experience some consequences. Unfortunately, most people only learn to treat others well by experiencing some discomfort for their behavior.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Why do I attract negative people?

Why do I attract negative people?

Question about affirmations

Question: Why do I attract negative people?

Answer: Are you an upbeat or downbeat personality? If you tend to be more negative, then you’re attracting people who are similar to you. You’ve heard of like attracts like? Where people who are similar tend to drift together? You could be drawing people to you who are reflecting that aspect back to you.

On the other hand, if you’re more optimistic, there’s also a principle of opposites attracting. Negative, as well as positive people, are attracted to those with a positive personality. The upbeat person is stronger, more optimistic, inspirational, and tends to uplift those around them. People like to bathe in the warmth and radiance. A negative person may want to be more positive, and therefore be attracted to the characteristic they want.

But there are also those people who want to tear down those whom they see as more gifted, optimistic, and happy. It’s not personal. Remember, “Misery loves company.” If they’re dismal, they want everyone to join them there. It’s not so much that you’ve attracted them, as that they’ve been attracted to you and your warmth. If you’re beginning to feel depleted by the negative people, gently send them on their way. You aren’t obligated to heal them.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Will hypnosis be dangerous if I misuse it?

Will hypnosis be dangerous if I misuse it?

Question about affirmations

Question: Will hypnosis be dangerous if I misuse it?

Answer: I get this question a lot. It’s based on a misunderstanding and misconception about hypnosis. If misused, anything in life is dangerous. Electricity powers our computers, lights, appliances, but if you put your finger in the electric socket, you run the danger of being killed.

In the case of hypnosis, it’s a normal state of mind that you’re in and out of everyday. Whenever you focus on anything, you’re in a state of hypnosis. The only way to misuse hypnosis is to give yourself negative suggestions that would decrease the quality of your life. But you do that whenever you make any kind of negative statement about yourself, put yourself down or say “I can’t.”

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Deal with thoughts during meditation?

Deal with thoughts during meditation?

Question about affirmations

Question: How do I deal with overwhelming thoughts when I’m trying to meditate?

Answer: It’s normal to have problems with thoughts distracting you during meditation. It happens to those first starting meditation as well as seasoned meditators. It’s one reason why there are so many meditation techniques that use some sort of focus, like a mantra or staring at a candle.

When I use self-hypnosis at the beginning of a meditation, I go deeper than with any other technique. And because you’re focusing on relaxing your body, counting down and then imagining a special place, it helps to calm down the errant thoughts. However, it is a constant practice to keep them calm and not let them distract you.

Whenever you have a thought try to get your attention, bring your focus back to your special place, affirmation or any visualization you’re using. You’re in the process of training your mind. Letting it know that you’re going to take charge. Once you’ve practiced enough to get the thoughts quieter, the next step is to be able to simply observe them and let them go.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Different affirmations at the same time?

Different affirmations at the same time?

Question about affirmations

Question: Can I use affirmations for different issues in the same day?

Answer: I’d suggest that unless the affirmations are for the same issue you not use them the same day. It’s not so much that it would confuse your subconscious as it would overload it if they’re on different issues.

Imagine you’re having to work on several different projects at the same time. You’d feel overwhelmed and wouldn’t get any of them done quickly. It would take much more time to get them all done, taking more time than if you’d done each separately.

I suggest you focus on one issue at a time. If you do want to add another affirmation, making it one for general improvement would be helpful.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

How can I concentrate better?

How can I concentrate better?

Question: How can I learn to concentrate better, so that my mind doesn’t wander?

Question about affirmations

Answer: Do you have a lot of pressure on you? Have you had a lot of stress? These would cause your mind to wander as a way of escaping and having a mental vacation. Have you been doing any meditation, exercise, or any sort of stress reduction techniques? That would be my first recommendation to you.

Secondly, sometimes, the mind gets tired of focusing, and needs some time away from it. Concentrating on one thing for a long period is exhausting, so if you’ve been doing that, start breaking the periods up.

This sounds odd, but simply doing meditation or self-hypnosis each day will give your mind a rest, while at the same time, they help to train your mind to concentrate better.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

Will saying an affirmation occasionally make changes?

Will saying an affirmation occasionally make changes?

Question about affirmationsQuestion: If I say an affirmation a few times a week, will it turn my life around?

Answer: Saying an affirmation a few times a week won’t undo decades of programming. Change won’t happen overnight. It takes about 30-40 days (and sometimes a few months depending on the difficulty of the issue) of CONCENTRATED focus and affirmations to turn things around.

By concentrated, I mean you can’t do the affirmations, then during the day, counteract them with old, negative beliefs. This gives the subconscious mixed messages. You have to catch those automatic, negative thoughts and turn them around to be consistent with the goal of your affirmation.

~ Linda-Ann Stewart

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